Healing Through the Timeline: Trauma, Ancestors and a New Earth

You may have heard me mention a “shitty breakup” that took place last fall. In fact, the nightmare of those four days took place exactly six months ago this past weekend.

To give you a little bit of context, my ex and I were together for two years. There was a lot about our relationship that was really good and loving, but we simply weren’t right for each other. We “officially” broke up last summer, but continued for all intents and purposes to be in each other’s lives as partners because we loved each other so much. So of course, I was fully invested in supporting her with her big annual event: a four-day in-residence retreat in September.

The specifics of what happened at that event are not important for this story. All you need to know is that my partner of two years broke my trust more hurtfully than I ever thought possible, in a way that was completely out of integrity at every turn. Even worse, this betrayal took place during a time when I put everything else aside to help her and support her vision. Even worse still, I was stuck at this event for four days in a leadership role. I couldn’t leave, as I was responsible for her event attendees. My only option for external support was two other staffers who knew what was going on and helped me hold it together in front of 60+ people. During that time, I called deeply upon my own reserves of resilience and self-love. All you need to know is that those were four of the most challenging days of my life, and I’ve been healing and processing the resulting lessons and trauma in waves for the last six months.

Please understand, I’m in a good place now. In fact, I’m super impressed with myself and the amazing healing work I’ve done. (Self-hug. Good job, Michelle!) Overall, I have grown into a much healthier, more vibrant and alive place than I’ve been in a long time. And even though that challenging experience gave rise to so much growth and goodness, that doesn’t mean it wasn’t hard as f***. Even six months later, I still have the occasional wave of trauma echoes rolling through, and I get to roll up my sleeves and practice grace and compassion.

One such wave came through in a big way last week, and it's directly related to that powerful Full Moon. (Did you see it coming up huge and orange the other night???)

I felt “off” all day Thursday and Friday. I felt tender, reactive, volatile and like my energy was blocked. I did my practices, canceled everything that wasn’t important and took care of myself because I could tell something big was ready to shift.

On Friday night, I woke up promptly a few minutes before 3am. (The time period of 3-5am is when a lot of energy healing and psychic activity takes place. Usually I’ll wake up at that time if there’s deep healing work to be done, or Spirit really wants my attention.) Instead of feeling exasperated or resentful as I sometimes do when nudged awake at this hour, I asked with calm curiosity, “What do you want me to know?”

Immediately, I knew that I was being haunted. I rarely use that term, but the word “haunted” popped unmistakably into my mind, and I felt a lingering energy present with me. I asked if I was being haunted by my ex. “Not exactly.” I felt some of her energy but it didn’t feel like her, specifically. I asked if I was being haunted by anyone or anything else. “No.”

Then I saw a vision of myself from six months ago, and I realized that I was being haunted by this past version of myself. I looked awful. The energy around me was sharp, hot and fragmented, like shattered glass. I also felt a lot of wetness (grief is a very “wet” emotional energy). This version of me from the past looked enraged, on the verge of tears, and ready to explode. In other words, I saw myself as I felt during those four days.

I maintained the feeling of calm curiosity as I surrounded this vision of myself with love and compassion. As I soothed this Self, I was transported back to the event. I saw my Current Self standing next to my Past Self. I saw my Current Self at times literally with my hands on my shoulders from behind, offering love and support to my Past Self. I literally had my own back. I watched myself walk by my own side through every trauma of those four days. My Current Self held my Past Self as I sobbed in rage and grief. I got to relive one of the most hurtful experiences of my life from the perspective of six months down the road, knowing that I am whole and illuminated on the other side of this challenge. I got to support my Past Self from a place of empowerment, grace and feeling secure in my own health, well-being and aliveness. Instead of simply remembering the event as my Past Self, I got to re-experience it with my Past Self, with all the perspective and grace of my current reality. And it felt completely different.

Take a moment and let this sink in: I got to retroactively go back and offer myself healing through the timeline (Energetic Principle #1, above). Read on.

When I think about my lived experience of the event, I remember how supported I felt, even in the midst of four of the worst days of my life. Despite the devastating feeling of betrayal and horrible disillusionment, despite feeling bitter, trapped and alone, I remember feeling almost surprised at how much loving energy I felt around me. I remember several moments when I looked around and almost laughed at the astonishing juxtaposition: on one hand, a key area of my life was actively falling apart in irreparable damage. On the other, I felt more connected, supported and loved than I had any logical reason to feel.

I know now that, during the event, the support I felt was coming not only from my Guides and Teachers (as I thought at the time), but also from my Current Self offering healing that positively impacted my past experience (Energetic Principle #2, above). Read on.

Two of these moments in particular stand out:

On Saturday night after the main event of the evening, I made my way back to the staff house I shared with my partner. I didn’t even know if she would come back that night, or if she would find somewhere else to stay. Regardless, I felt sickened, physically nauseated and shaking from head to toe. Then the weirdest sensation came over me, and I watched as my hands started packing up all my things. Literally, that’s what it felt like. I didn’t consciously make the decision, but somehow my body was moving as if someone else had taken control and was telling it what to do. I watched my body move calmly around the space and was fascinated at the precise care and assuredness my hands exhibited, while my heart and mind felt anything but calm. At the time, I simply marveled at the feeling and let it happen.

The other night as I lay in bed and watched this vision, I saw my Current Self packing up my things at the event. I watched myself calmly and firmly guide my Past Self to take the necessary steps to remove myself from further harm, just as I would guide a friend or client in the middle of a traumatic situation. What I experienced in the moment at the event was my Current Self directing my movements, during a time when I was incapable of making grounded decisions and taking empowered action. Just like my friend describing the car accident, I experienced the visceral feeling of receiving my own, retroactive healing during the traumatic moment itself.

The other big moment of healing I experienced directly while at the event took place that night as I lay awake in a fiery rage. After wandering around and finding absolutely no available beds (short of dragging a mattress into the van), I had decided to sleep on a narrow cot in the next room, rather than stay one more second in a bed I had shared with my partner. I lay seething, wracked with grief and rage in equal measure, and used my breath to open my channels and allow the energy to flow. Suddenly, I was overcome with bliss. I didn’t consciously understand it, but I knew somehow that I had shifted out of the raw pain and into the pure life force at its core. I didn’t question it, I simply let myself dissolve in that bliss and be revitalized by it.

The other night as I watched this vision, I saw my Current Self kneeling beside the cot, placing my hands on my Past Self and offering all the healing love and compassion in my heart. And I saw the practices and intention I had at the time combine with and respond to this healing through the timeline. In the past, I experienced it as an inexplicable gratitude and euphoria. But now I know that I was able to retroactively heal and alter my lived experience of an incredibly traumatic circumstance. I felt healing take place the other night as I offered love to myself in the past, and I felt healing even while at the event, as I received love and blessings from myself in the future.

When I eventually did go back to sleep the other night, I knew that some profound healing work had taken place. Indeed, the next several days have felt much lighter and clearer.
 

TAKEAWAYS:

(If you decided to skip ahead, resume reading here.)

• I was guided by Spirit to offer healing energy to a past situation, and it worked.

• I experienced a profound and immediate relief by offering healing energy through the timeline. I feel the effects of this healing not only in my current reality, but I also experienced the benefits during the traumatic incident itself.

• As citizens of Earth and Lightworkers on this planet, we all received a powerful Priest/ess activation from the Virgo Full Moon. We are all being prompted and activated to offer healing energy throughout the timeline for the benefit of All Beings.

• As we are empowered Creators building a New Earth, we have the opportunity to offer healing to our ancestors, to our own past lives, to our descendants and to the future of Earth.

• It is vitally important that we use this Sacred Work to offer healing through the timeline, not only to clear and heal trauma from the past, but also to set the course for our future, personally and collectively.

• At a time of tremendous uncertainty and fear, a lot of people are asking, “What’s going to happen?” Friends, we answer that question every day with our choices, our prayers, our words and our actions. Instead of asking what the future holds, part of the Priest/ess path is the Sacred Work of anchoring in the frequency of harmonious alignment, joy, peace and right relation that spans throughout the timeline. The Sacred Work is to lovingly guide our planet and all beings to live in alignment with frequency, and create a New Earth in that vision.

  Get Support:

  Are you ready to step fully into your Embodied, Wild Self and offer powerful healing throughout the timeline, for the benefit of All Beings?
  
  Apply now for Embody Wild™ 1:1! Check out the details and submit your application here.

Practice Prompts For You:

(This is a new style so I'm open to feedback on this variation of Practice Prompt--let me know how you like it! One prompt each for ceremony, journaling, movement, discussion and inspired action.)

Ceremony: Hold a Full Moon ritual for yourself (if you haven’t already)

Journal: What is my Sacred Work?

Move: Ask your body how it wants to feel, move and express your Sacred Work. Dance, roll, stretch, walk it out.

Discuss: With a friend/family/community member, talk about the concept of healing through the timeline. What past challenges and traumas would you like to heal for yourself and for the planet? What future healing would you like to see for yourself and for everyone?

Act: What ONE inspired action step can you take TODAY to move in this direction?

Get Support: Are you ready to step fully into your Embodied, Wild Self and offer powerful healing throughout the timeline, for the benefit of All Beings?

Apply now for Embody Wild™ 1:1!

Eagle Creek and the Waters of Renewal

Eagle Creek was one of my favorite hikes before the Gorge fire in 2017.

I know other people loved it, too. Of all the beautiful hikes in the Columbia River Gorge, Eagle Creek was one of the most popular, with good reason. Not only was it a comfortable hike through gorgeous forest, but it took you along the creek to a spectacular waterfall and swimming hole. I traversed that trail many times and have enjoyed several epic picnics at the waterfall.

When the Gorge burned for months in 2017, I was devastated. Everyone was devastated.

In an interesting twist of timing, I had hiked that very trail not long before the fire, and had collected some water for ceremony from the creek. I had no idea that would be the last time I visited that sacred place for years to come (the trail is still closed), and that this rejuvenating spring of life and flow would soon be engulfed in flames and choked with ash.

When the fire began, I used some of my collection right away as part of a water blessing ceremony. But after that, the jar of Eagle Creek water stayed closed for over a year. It felt as though the water itself was in shock, and needed to rest and be still.

Sometime last year, the Eagle Creek water started calling to me. It was ready to work again, slowly and gently. I started using it on my altar, and noticed the energy it brought to the container held a profound mastery of Death and Rebirth. The Eagle Creek water held the burning fires of transformation.

At the end of last year, as I was going through my own major Death process, the Eagle Creek water made its presence known even more powerfully, and brought to my healing work a deep sense of surrender, trust and allowing. The Eagle Creek water held the wisdom of letting go, of releasing the unnecessary, of purification.

This morning as I redid my altar and was replacing the water, Eagle Creek water shouted at me with its strength and power. I felt it bursting with life, renewal and creative potential. Eagle Creek is alive and thriving. The burn scars are still there, but aliveness is exploding forth from the purified Earth. This morning, the Eagle Creek water showed me that it held the sacred rage and grief of all those who loved this place. It held the death and sacred destruction of the fires. It held the burning, the release, the purification. But the Eagle Creek water also holds life, renewal, vitality, and resurrection. It holds the aliveness of growing things, of new form, of building new structures. Eagle Creek water offered to support me in cultivating these energies, in my life and in the world.

This was the last of the water that I collected 2 1/2 years ago at one of my favorite places on Earth. As I meditated this morning with my revitalized altar, the powerful energies of Eagle Creek and its rebirth were undeniable.

I am so grateful to this sacred place and to the elements of this place for holding space not only for my own healing and transformation, but for so many people. This place was beloved by many. So many people walked the trail, swam in the pool, enjoyed its magic. So many people grieved as Eagle Creek burned.

I can only hope that as many people are receiving the powerful aliveness and renewal that is emanating from Eagle Creek now. As I embody the wild, untamed, pure life-ness of Eagle Creek and let this rejuvenating force express through me, may it benefit all beings.

If you've been to Eagle Creek, I invite you to tune in to your embodied, wild awareness of that sacred space. What energy do you notice there?

If you've never been to Eagle Creek, I still invite you to tune in to this sacred space. What do you notice in your embodied awareness of this powerful place?

What would be possible for you if you had full, uninhibited access to expressing the most wild, free, untamed, powerful parts of yourself? What would be different in your life, in the lives of your loved ones, and in the world if you were to embody your own, wild nature?

Are you ready to join me in the Embody Wild™ movement? Apply here

Many blessings,

Eagle Creek before the fire (image from Oregon Wild)

You did not come here to be a spiritual being.

You did not come here to be a spiritual being.

You already have access to all the mysteries and all knowledge. You are already connected to the infinite, the Divine, the whole perfection of Source.

Your soul is already perfect.

But you did not come here for that. You came to Earth for something else.

You came to Earth not to live as a spiritual being, but as an Embodied one.

You made the choice, long before you were born, to actualize your consciousness into a body on this beautiful, unique planet. You chose to gift yourself the experience of a lifetime on Earth, in this beautiful, unique body. You chose to embody a new form, born as a soft and tender animal, and explore this physical plane through your beautiful, unique life.

So why aren’t you living fully in your body?

I promise, you’re not alone. Most other humans aren’t fully embodied, either.

Most people are living their lives checked out of their bodies. Maybe they’re up in their head all the time, maybe they’re using spiritual practice as an escape from Earthly life, maybe they use crutches like Netflix, food, alcohol, sex, drugs, shopping, social media, being busy, their careers, the news, drama—anything to avoid being fully present within their own bodies. Anything to dilute and distract themselves.

I get it. I didn’t fully land in my Earth body until my early 20s. But I’ll tell you that story another time.

You might be wondering, “So? What’s the problem? Earth is hard. My life is busy. Why should I care about being Embodied?”

Oh, my dear human friend, you can’t afford NOT to care. None of us can.

You see, common understanding (and societal conditioning) tells us that human bodies are machines to be exercised and fed according to numbers and formulas. It tells us that bodies are prone to sickness and need medications to be normal. It tells us that we need to cover them up with fashionable items and that some bodies are more attractive and worthy than others. It tells us that our bodies are primitive—merely houses for the true power of the mind, heart and soul. Common understanding would have us believe that the body is the least important, least powerful aspect of our existence.

All of this could not be farther from the truth.

Friend, your body is a miracle. Your body is a perfect child of Earth. Your body is a powerful, magical animal that holds all the power and wisdom of Gaia within each cell.

Living fully in your body is the key to your own liberation.

Fully inhabiting your body will give you more power, life force, vitality, trust, creativity and pleasure than you ever imagined.

What would be possible for you if you had full, uninhibited access to expressing the most wild, free, untamed, powerful parts of yourself? What would be different in your life, in the lives of your loved ones, and in the world if you were to embody your own, wild nature?

Are you ready to join me in the Embody Wild™ movement? Apply here

Many blessings,

“The Church says: the body is a sin.
Science says: the body is a machine.
Advertising says: the body is a business.
The Body says: I am a fiesta.”

― Eduardo Galeano, Walking Words

Why you probably don't have an entity (and no one is attacking you)

I have learned to never be surprised by the shit people tell me, or by people contacting me out of the blue with some truly wild stories. Seriously—my email is a fascinating read. I regularly receive messages from random people that range from two sentences to a few pages long, and most of these emails include the person’s assumption that they have picked up a harmful entity, and/or someone or something is attacking them. Occasionally, people request an exorcism.

My response to these people varies, depending on the level of wackadoo in the email. I will usually offer support in the form of resources and practices to ground and strengthen the field. (I tell them, “go watch this podcast episode, do these practices for a week and then let me know how you’re doing.”) If the person seems relatively grounded and stable, I may invite them to do some sessions with me.

Interestingly, the people that I give practices to never circle back around with me. Seriously. Not once. This astonishes me, because in my mind, if I thought I had an entity and a Shaman told me to do something to support my system, I would do exactly what they told me.

Of the people I have worked with who came in thinking they had entities, attachments or were being attacked by someone or something, care to guess how many actually did?

Answer: a small handful.

In other words, over the 15+ years that I’ve been studying and practicing Shamanism and healing work, the percentage of people who think they have an entity or are being attacked, who ACTUALLY have an entity or are being attacked, is tiny. Like, maybe 5%.

So, what’s going on with the other 95%?

Without fail, the other 95% of people do not actually have entities or attachments, and are not being attacked by anyone or anything. Instead, they are feeling their own Shadow, and ascribing their discomfort to something outside of themselves.

Here are a few notable examples:

1. Several years ago, a woman contacted me about getting an exorcism for her 8-year-old granddaughter. She described the situation and I tuned into the field. Did the granddaughter have an entity? Answer: no. She was just being an 8-year-old and processing a lot of trauma in the only way she knew how—by screaming, acting out and going from zero to tantrum at the drop of a hat. I offered healing work (not an exorcism) and the woman said no. I believe she went on to have her granddaughter exorcised by a priest. (Cringe.)

2. Last year, a client came to me who thought he had entities that were making him tired and depressed. Did he? Answer: no. He was processing his own Shadow and metabolizing energy on behalf of his lineage. We did some very powerful healing sessions that released ancestral trauma, rewrote some unhealthy soul contracts and supported him in stepping into his empowered soul work and purpose.

3. Recently, my ex asked me if I was “sending her bad juju.” When I asked for clarification, she said she felt a lot of bad energy coming from me and was physically afraid for her safety. She thought I was attacking her. Was I? Answer: of course not. The fact that she thought I would further illustrated the wisdom of that separation. What was actually happening? She was most likely processing her Shadow and pain body magnified by our breakup.

4. A while ago, a woman reached out about her son. She was concerned for his health, and thought that he might have an entity or attachment. It turns out that the boy’s father had died in a bad way and that the boy had been the one to find him. Did he have an attachment? Answer: in this case, yes. The father’s spirit had attached to the boy.

These are only a few examples, but my god, people! The level of story-making blows my mind. Why do people so quickly jump to the conclusion that they have an entity, or that someone or something is attacking them? How did this become a thing?

I have a few thoughts on this:

1. Generally speaking, most people don’t understand the principle of Shadow or Shadow Work. For our purposes in Shamanic and Alchemical philosophy, the Shadow is “that which is unseen or unintegrated.” If people are confronted with their Shadow, it’s probably something they’ve been avoiding and it makes them uncomfortable.

2. If people aren’t used to being uncomfortable, they will try to explain their discomfort by assuming something is wrong, rather than “I’m processing trauma” or “I feel really bad about my decisions” or “I’m learning some really hard lessons right now,” and letting that be okay.

3. Projecting the discomfort to an external source means that people don’t have to take responsibility for it. If they’re not ready to own the energy and actually move through it, it’s a lot easier to blame their off-ness on an entity or an attack.

4. If people think there is an external source to blame, it means they get to be a victim, and they don’t actually have to change themselves or their behavior. Instead of looking at how they are creating or contributing to this experience, people think that the problem to be fixed is simply getting rid of the entity or stopping the attack.

5. Pop culture has glorified and misrepresented possession, entities, psychic attacks and all sorts of other bullshit. Yes, all of these things do exist. Yes, it is possible to be possessed, to have an entity or attachment, and energetic attack is totally a thing. However, it is not the most LIKELY explanation. Far more likely is the Shadow Work explanation. Occam’s razor, people: the simplest solution is probably the correct one.

The next time you’re moving through some uncomfortable energy and wondering if you have an entity or are being attacked… stop. It’s probably just your own Shadow. Here’s what to do:

1. Regulate your energy. Use energetic and physical practices to clear, ground, cultivate and protect your field. If you don’t know any of these techniques, tune in to my podcast, Shaman Sister Sessions. Katherine Bird and I offer lots of tools and practices.

2. Once you’ve regulated your field, assess how you’re doing. Ask yourself some guiding questions to learn more about your experience. Examples include:

   • What energy is moving through me?

   • What part of me is asking to be seen?

   • What am I getting out of this experience?

   • What part of me is asking to change or transform?

3. If you still need help, contact me! Yes, I know how to do exorcisms, but you probably don’t need one. Instead, we would most likely work on supporting your field, metabolizing unprocessed energy, healing trauma, actualizing your purpose and bringing you into your fullest, most empowered expression in the world. Isn’t that more fun than an exorcism?

When these people who contact me choose to show up and work with the Shadow, the results are incredibly powerful. Imagine consciously and lovingly working with the unseen and unintegrated parts of yourself to bring them into a harmonious state. Wouldn’t you love to give yourself that gift? Instead of keeping it surface level and assuming that someone or something else is to blame for your experience, imagine taking empowered agency for your process and transmuting your own Shadow.

Special sneak peek: new Shaman Sister Sessions episode comes out on Thursday! Episodes #92 and #93 are both about Entities, Attachments and Psychic Attacks. Episode #92 continues this conversation about why you probably don’t have an entity. Episode #93 talks about what to do if you do have an energetic attachment. Want access to the episodes? Join Lightworker Portal—the FREE community I created just for you! Get instant access to all the content archives.

Whether you have an entity or not (let’s face it: probably not) the opportunity for you is the same: to transmute your Shadow, to master your energy and to embody your fully empowered sovereignty. Regardless of how you choose to learn this lesson, your own Soul is inviting you to be more powerful and compassionate, and live with more grace than ever before.

This is true Alchemy.

If you find yourself in a situation like this, it's because your Soul is giving you the keys to your own actualization. Even though the energy may feel dense, heavy, insurmountable and incredibly painful, it is this same energy that will liberate you. This is your own personal lead--the heavy base metal that you get to transform into Gold. Your Soul is calling you to step up and alchemize your Shadow into your greatest Light. Your Soul is asking you to alchemize your pain into joy. Your Soul is inviting you to alchemize your grief, your anger, your suffering into grace, compassion and peace.

If you’re ready to say YES to your Soul, I’m here to help.

Do you want to…

• …go from feeling like you’re living at the whims of change, to intentionally choosing your own path of transformation and creation?

• …have a roadmap to guide you through the hardest transformational moments of your life?

• …learn tools and practices that will immediately and noticeably enhance your vitality, health, energy and well-being?

• …know without a shadow of a doubt that you are living your life “on purpose?”

• …feel connected to something bigger than yourself? Do you want to commune with Spirit through this ancient and powerful lineage?

• …use these powerful tools to support loved ones, clients and your community in their journey of transformation and actualization?

Applications are now open for Embody-Wild that will help you heal your Shadow.



Check out all the details here.

Many Blessings,

Practice prompt:

Get comfortable sitting with your Shadow body. Rather than dismissing or avoiding it, practice asking questions like:

• What energy is moving through me?

• What part of me is asking to be seen?

• What am I getting out of this experience?

• What part of me is asking to change or transform?

WARNING: Calling major bullshit on marketing and the path of Self-Actualization

THIS  COMMON  PSYCHOLOGICAL  PRINCIPLE  YOU  HAVE  PROBABLY  NEVER  HEARD  OF  IS  KILLING  YOU.

Just kidding! But you've probably seen headlines and marketing like that, right? That's because most marketing uses aforementioned common psychological principle to attack base-level human needs. This principle is known as Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, and today, I'm going to share with you:

1. My utter disdain for traditional marketing (barf)

2. How Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs and its implications are actually a huge detriment to our individual and collective human experience (actually, it may even be killing us)

3. How you can re-interpret this principle to help you make more money, have more free time, have better sex and get your dream job (but not in the way you think, haha)

Let's have a look at this silly principle. Maybe you’ve heard of the Hierarchy of Needs before, or seen a graphic like this one:

I see this concept tossed around most commonly in the context of marketing. If you also hang around with entrepreneurs, I’m guessing you’ve encountered this, too. The advice I hear from business and marketing coaches always seems to be the same: “Find the universal need that your service provides for people and speak to that.” Usually, this means, “Tell potential clients how your service can help them make more money, have more free time, have better sex and get their dream job.” Ever notice how much coach-y and personal development programs focus on this in their marketing? If you haven’t yet, just keep an eye out and you’ll see what I mean.

This is where I take huge issue not only with “spiritual business coaches” (BARF) and marketing to these base-level needs, but also with the Hierarchy of Needs itself (and the way in which this plays out in social norms and expectations of the collective consciousness). How are we supposed to evolve as a global community if this is our psychological conditioning?

Let’s examine this graphic. This food-pyramid-esque image would lead one to believe that the most vital needs are physiological (I’m on board so far), but as we move up the pyramid, we notice that Self-Actualization occupies the little tiny triangle on top. In between are Safety (health, money, home), Love and Belonging (family, connection, community), and Esteem (respect, status, recognition). That’s where I take issue.

Based on the organization of this hierarchy, we can assume that the need of Self-Actualization can only be fulfilled once all tiers below it are fulfilled, and that needs should be addressed in ascending order.

This is total bullshit.

What happens if we treat Self-Actualization as conditional upon all these other things? What are we costing ourselves by saving it for last?

What people don’t understand is that Self-Actualization will help you satisfy all those other needs, and in a more authentic and fulfilling way. Maslow has it backwards.

Let’s look at a re-interpretation of the Hierarchy of Needs. Here, I re-imagined it from two perspectives: Shadow (unactualized) and Light (actualized). What do you notice about the Shadow and Light manifestations of these needs?

Let's look at an example "Shadow" life trajectory of someone who pursues these needs in a linear fashion, as indicated by Maslow's hierarchy.

Imagine this: someone spends the first thirty years of their life working their butt off to get a good job (Safety), gets married and has two kids before age 35 (Love and Belonging) and finally succeeds in getting promoted to the C-suite (Esteem). They then look around at their life for meaning, have an existential crisis because they don’t know who they are as a person, quit their job, divorce their spouse and go on a quest to “find themselves.” (Think I’m exaggerating? I can name a dozen personal acquaintances and clients off the top of my head who have lived some version of this story. I bet you know at least one person who has had this experience.)

Now you might be thinking, “Michelle, this perspective applies to a fairly privileged subset of society. What about other types of people?” Let’s look at this play out for someone else:

Imagine that our second person grew up in an unstable home environment. They live in an underserved community but they do their best to try to make sure their family has somewhere to live (Safety). Maybe they find community in the form of a gang or an abusive partner (Love and Belonging). They have a child before the age of 20, they struggle with substance abuse but they manage to hold it together enough to make ends meet and eventually secure a decent job (Esteem). …until it all comes crashing down around their ears, they think, “I can’t keep living like this,” have an existential crisis and lose everything. (Yes, I have had some of these people as my clients as well.)

Regardless of the path they took to get there, by the time these people find me, they are often in some state of desperation or dire straits in regards to their personal life path and purpose. They desire depth, meaning and fulfillment. They want their lives to be an authentic, positive contribution to the world. Above all, they want to come into the full expression of who they are as a whole person. And they know that any of these other external factors (home, relationship, career, reputation) won’t ever be fully whole, healthy and stable until they access the full potential of who they are.

Let's examine a "Light" life trajectory through the hierarchy of needs. Imagine now that both of our example people had had access to the idea of Self-Actualization as the primary question that informed the pursuit of these other needs. (Maybe they learned about it from family, or in school, or through other early influences.) Once the physiological needs are met, the next quests are a simultaneous investigation of Who am I?” (Self-Actualization) and “As I learn who I am, how does that version of myself live in the world?” (Safety). The pursuit of self-knowledge informs the journey to achieve safety, and vice-versa. This self-aware person may then pursue the needs of Love and Belonging as this emerging, whole Self. Then, when they achieve Esteem, it comes not from the place of ego-inflated-self-aggrandizement, but instead from genuine self-respect and integrity. This person has more authentic and healthy relationships, more fulfilling career, more genuine self-image and more potential for continued growth and harmonious existence. (In other words, they probably make more money, have more free time, have better sex and work their dream job.)

Maybe you recognize some part of your own path in these examples. What would have been different for you if you had given Self-Actualization just as much priority as these other needs? What could be different for you moving forward if you made Self-Actualization a true priority?

The problem is, most of us are spoon-fed so much social conditioning that tells us that Self-Actualization is a luxury, when in reality, it is the fundamental question of humanity: to know oneself. Instead of encouraging this investigation, our current social structures try to sell us the illusion of safety, love and status. But anyone who markets to the levels of Safety, Love and Belonging, and Esteem is preying on base-level human psychology. And if I told you that by participating in my I AM Alchemy course you would obtain these things, I would be blowing smoke up your ass. I can’t guarantee that for you, and I wouldn’t want to. No one can promise you that. Anyone who does is lying.

Instead, I can invite you to consider your true needs and motivation. Do you just want to make more money, or do you actually want to make more money by helping people with the true medicine of your own enlivened soul? Do you just want better sex, or do you actually want more authentic intimacy and respect with your partner that comes from knowing yourself deeply as a person, and being able to connect on that level? Do you just want more free time, or do you actually want more intentional space in your life for creating meaningful experiences that will nourish and uplift you and your family? Do you just want the “dream job” that looks good on paper, or do you actually want a career that challenges you to grow as a person, fulfill your life purpose and contribute positively to the planet?

Embody Wild won’t help you make more money, have better sex, have more free time or get your dream job.

But it will help you find out who you really are. It will teach you tools of self-inquiry, mastery and power. It will give you the space and freedom to discover the magic of your own soul and create your life according to the blueprint of your fully actualized Self.

Embody Wild is not a course for results-oriented people who want instant gratification. Embody Wild is instead a course for those who understand that there are no shortcuts to self-actualization, but that once you embark on this path, the world opens up before you and anything is possible. Embody Wild is for those who are ready to prioritize their own journey of meaning. Embody Wild won’t give you the answer to those other levels of need, but it will show you how to create it for yourself.

...and applications for Embody Wild are open now. If you're ready to see what Embody Wild holds for you, begin the process by submitting your application here.

Are you ready for self-actualization, which will give you the keys to everything else?

Many blessings,

Practice prompt:

Let's look again at this re-interpretation of the Hierarchy of Needs. Take a moment to consider your own life path and trajectory.

Without judgement, what do you notice about yourself and your patterns? How are you engaging with the Shadow and Light interpretations of these needs? What does that mean for your process of Self Actualization? Where do you see yourself in each of these areas?

Part of me was afraid to go to Avalon, and now I know why (plus pictures!)

I returned 90 days ago from a priestess pilgrimage to Avalon. Since then, in addition to massive growth and activation, my life has been completely upended in a few key areas. For these past three months, I’ve been sitting with rage, grief, betrayal, catharsis, purification, power and resilience.

…which is exactly what I was afraid of.

My first morning in Avalon--I awoke before sunrise with a sense of urgency to go up the Tor (the hill). I practically ran to the top and did qi gong as the sun rose orange and burned off the surrounding mist.

In case you’re not familiar with Avalon, it’s an ancient and sacred site in England, most well known in mythology relating to King Arthur and the Lady of the Lake. The Isle of Avalon corresponds to the contemporary town of Glastonbury, where there are many cherished sacred sites. I had been feeling the Soul Calling to travel to Avalon for well over a year. The circumstances of my trip were about as divinely aligned as one could imagine, and for months preceding my trip, I felt the energy building with power and possibility.

And yet, along with that sense of power and potential came fear. As I journaled in preparation for the pilgrimage, I found myself expressing trepidation and anxiety. The fear I felt wasn’t attached to any particular concern—I knew from my meditations and my guidance that this pilgrimage was part of a series of powerful initiations, and that I would receive incredible activations as part of my journey. But along with the knowledge of the activations that awaited me, a very human survival-level fear lurked in the background.

It’s a lot easier for me to look back now and understand what I felt at the time. As I was preparing to head into this powerful initiation portal, the part of me that felt afraid was the part of me that has been dying since that trip—the part of me that was burned to ash in my rage, dissolved in a pool of grief and slashed by the sharp blade of betrayal. That part has ultimately surrendered to catharsis.

Friend, have you ever experienced a Soul Calling that simultaneously thrilled and terrified you? Have you felt the raw power and potential that awaits you, but known that it comes at the cost of the life you used to lead? Have you known that, as you were choosing your own liberation, you were also choosing your own death?

I spent more time on the Tor than pretty much anywhere else in Avalon. Here I am after another sunrise practice. I also watched a couple of sunsets, went up a handful of times during the day, and twice after sunset to look at the stars.

I also spent a lot of time in the Chalice Well Gardens. This is the Chalice Well itself, which is connected to the Red Spring (one of the sacred springs of Avalon). I did several mornings of qi gong practice by the Lion's Head fountain in the gardens.

This is exactly the nature of the fear that I felt leading up to my trip. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my pilgrimage to Avalon was rooted in pure soul calling and resonance, but that by taking the trip, I would have to finally let go of one of the most significant aspects of my life. I knew that the initiations I received on this journey would offer me more power and freedom than I could consciously understand, but that I would also be choosing the death of my old self.

Friend, it has been a bumpy ride. This particular death cycle has primarily taken the form of an incredibly challenging breakup. The exact details aren’t important for this story, but suffice it to say that I have been witnessing with dumbfounded amazement the perfect shitstorm that is continuing to unfold even as we speak. Every time I think the situation has bottomed out, the bottom drops again.

It. Fucking. Sucks.

…but in addition to the massive suck-age and heartache, I am also present to the cosmic perfection of it all. My former partner and I were together for two years, despite knowing that we weren’t each other’s people. We figured out very early on in our relationship that we wanted different things and had different visions for our lives, but decided to journey together anyway out of our mutual love and appreciation, and the growth that was available to us even as not-forever-partners. We each became the go-to person for the other. We built a life together that was rich, beautiful and fun. We were in love, and it was good.
But it wasn’t right, and we both knew it. In fact, we both knew it for more than a year before we finally separated in September.

Looking back now, I can easily see that the fear I felt before going to Avalon came from the part of me that knew it would not survive the journey. The version of me in the not-right partnership, the life I had built with someone I loved and was unwilling to leave: that was the part that felt afraid and resistant. That part of me knew that the initiations I would receive on the pilgrimage would shift me out of alignment with staying in that relationship. I knew that going to Avalon and walking through that portal would mean the end of that chapter of my life.

And just three short weeks after arriving back from Avalon, it all came crashing down in a non-negotiable, can’t-possibly-ignore, what-the-fuck-is-happening, shitstorm that I have been processing and integrating since the beginning of September.

Even though the aftermath of my Avalon trip looks for all intents and purposes like total destruction, entering that initiation portal was one of the most powerful choices I have ever made, and I have no regrets. Even though it has meant the death of my relationship (along with many other connected parts of my identity and life structure) and the continued processing of uncomfortable feelings and shitty circumstances, I am glad I chose that path. Remember the rage, grief, betrayal and catharsis I mentioned earlier? Even though these energies have challenged me to my core, they have been vitally important to the process, because they gave me the perfect fodder to alchemize into true power and resilience. I am blowing my own mind every day with who I am becoming and what I am capable of.

My group had private access to Stonehenge on the last day of the pilgrimage.

Just as I’m experiencing the 3D “whiplash” in response to massive energetic expansion, this Soul Calling has also paved the way for massive growth in other areas. My energetic mastery, psychic perception and attunement to the subtle levels is off the charts. Aside from the relationship blowup, my return from Avalon has included many creative and fruitful projects. I have also begun to refine my work with Dragons and work with higher-vibration practices. My physical body feels more healthy and vital, my community connections are flourishing and I have been invited to share my work in new and exciting places.

I have shared very little about my Avalon trip (it’s obviously still landing and integrating), but it felt important to share with you about the ripple effects of an activation experience. (Side note: did you catch the episode of Shaman Sister Sessions that went out two weeks ago? It was about Soul Activations, and it is directly related to our topic for today. Check it out here.) In particular, I wanted to share this with you because I know I’m not alone when it comes to feeling fear around a soul calling.

Friend, I bet you can relate. Maybe you’ve had an experience like mine, where you feel the power and potential leading up to an initiation experience, knowing that part of you will die in the process, but you choose it anyway. Or maybe you have felt the power and potential emanating from a soul calling, but you haven’t answered it because the cost seems too great. Maybe you’re afraid to let that part of yourself die, so you have yet to step through the initiation portal that awaits you.

I am here to tell you that you will be okay. I promise. It might not seem like it, and believe me, I’ve heard all the objections. Their Soul Calling will lead them to this lineage and body of knowledge, but when it comes time to commit to their journey, their hidden fears come up. When we dig deeper and finally get to the root of it, they say things like, “I’m afraid my marriage won’t survive,” or, “I’m afraid I’ll lose my friends and family because they won’t understand me,” or, “I’m afraid I won’t be able to keep putting up with what I have been tolerating,” or, “I’m afraid because I don’t know who I’ll be if I say yes to that level of growth.” Essentially, all of these people fear the same thing: the death of their old Self.

What about you? What Soul Calling is inviting you to step through a powerful initiation portal, and at what cost? What liberation, power and potential awaits you as you surrender your past self to death?

Are you willing to let yourself die in order to grow and be reborn? Are you willing to shift out of alignment with everything that doesn’t serve you anymore, so you can create more of what does?

It may not be comfortable, but I promise, it’s worth it.

And if your Soul Calling is asking you to step into the initiation portal of Embody Wild, I invite you to answer the call. What growth, expansion and rebirth waits for you on the other side?

If you're ready to see what Embody Wild holds for you, begin the process by submitting your application here.

Your Soul Calling is waiting for you. What do you need to do to answer it?

Many blessings,

Inspiration

While at Stonehenge, I had several visions, past life memories and revisited soul agreements. This was one of the places where I passed through a major initiation portal.

Can you see the double rainbow? I took this picture on my last evening in Avalon after a torrential rainstorm. I climbed Wearyall hill to get a look at the Tor and was treated to this powerful sight.

Did you choose Transformation, or did it choose you?

Oh my dear,

I feel you. I hear your voice of confusion, asking to be held and witnessed. I hear your heartfelt prayers for clarity, for healing, for understanding, for love. I recognize your face in every person I meet who feels alone, misunderstood, rejected, or like they're not enough.

Right now, you're at a turning point. Maybe you chose this transformation, or maybe it chose you... but either way, you and your world are changing.

I get that it can feel scary. Even if you consciously know that this transformation is a good thing, it can still feel fucking terrifying.

But your life is asking you to be bigger. Your soul is asking you to be more of who you are. Your heart is hammering to be seen, to be felt, to be loved. The fullness of your own spirit is asking you to lean in closer, to be uncomfortable, and to trust yourself to go through this messy, epic, painful, beautiful journey.

...but you know that you have a choice, right?

You know that you don't HAVE to say yes to this transformation. You don't HAVE to show up for yourself and the fullness of your heart. You can stay exactly where you are, as you are. No one is going to make you show up and be powerful. No one is going to force you to be extraordinary.

If you want to stay where you are, that's perfectly okay.

If you want to stay where you are, you can stop reading now, because the rest of this letter isn't for you.

If you're still reading...

It means that you're saying YES to your heart.

It means that you're willing to be uncomfortable in order to grow.

It means that you are willing to let the old version of your Self and your life burn away to create space for something else.

And if you are ready to step into that, know that you don't have to do it alone.

I am here to stand in the flames with you, as the fires of transformation turn your old Self to ash. I am here to help you feel safe to fall apart, to cry, and to let go of who you used to be. I am here to teach you, and give you tools for healing, healthy perspective and guidance. I am here to help you rise like the phoenix you are, to celebrate your rebirth as your authentic and powerful Self. I am here to walk beside you on this path of transformation.

My dear, I've been exactly where you are right now. I see your uncertainty, I see your pain, I see your fear. But more importantly, I see your sincere heart. I see the brilliant light at your core. I see your desire to move through this process and prove to yourself that you are capable, you are worthy and you have something powerful to offer this Earth.

And if you want a guide who is willing to stand in the fire with you, I am here.

Are you ready to say YES to receiving that kind of support?
 

If so, apply now to i AM Alchemy!

In the words of a recent client:
  "In the time I worked with Michelle, my lived experience has completely shifted for the positive. Michelle’s vision was pivotal in assisting my overcoming outdated and lingering traumas. She supported me in removing the broken armour, revisioning my personal independence and reclaiming my vitality. She was my collaborator, my mirror and my teacher. Michelle called me up to move through grief and become more of myself with every step. I am deeply soul-level grateful for her in my life."
What would be possible if you received support like that?

Take the first step now. Submit your application here.

Many blessings,

The School of Shamanic Underworld Initiation

Are you ready for a big announcement???

Drum roll, please...

I am going back to school!!!

Now, I know you might be thinking that this seems sort of unexpected. Believe me, I'm just as surprised as you are! Let's just say an opportunity fell in my lap that I can't possibly ignore. This special invitation is beckoning me to continue my studies, deepen in my practice and step into my Mastery more than I ever have. How could I say no?

Would you like to know about this school?

Again, drum roll...

I'm happy to announce that I'm attending the school of Shamanic Underworld Initiation!!!

Hahahahaaaa okay, please forgive the joke. But for real, y'all, if you've been through an underworld initiation of your own, you know as well as I do that it can school you harder than pretty much anything else. (Based on my previous studies, looks like I'll be going for my PhD.)

What is Underworld Initiation?

For those of you who might not be familiar with the term, an Underworld Initiation (also known as Dark Night of the Soul) is a Spirit-led initiation through the Shadow mysteries, usually precipitated by a big life change or traumatic event, and characterized by ego death, radical transformation and rebirth in a new, elevated form.

...that is, if you do it right.

See, the thing about underworld initiation is that most people don't seize the opportunity, and instead hang out in their confusion/trauma or never completely go through the necessary catharsis. Some of the most common ways that people avoid fully moving through their Dark Night of the Soul are through distraction (which can take many forms, including relationship, career, shopping, hobbies, internet/TV, food, etc), medication and substance abuse.

But when we're fully present to an underworld initiation cycle, I am here to tell you that it is crazy powerful and you will come into some next-level magic as a result. It will be pretty fucking uncomfortable, but it is totally worth it.

What do you learn in an Underworld Initiation?

What you learn in your underworld initiation(s) will be different from mine and anyone else's. In essence, you will be confronted with opportunities to shift and/or release your personal shadow patterns and wounding, and come into deeper Self Mastery from a place of authentic actualization. If you're successful, the lesson usually either doesn't show up again, or it shows up in a different way that helps you go even deeper in your Mastery. If you don't make the shift, you're very likely to see a repeat of your Shamanic Underworld Initiation school curriculum the next time around.

Here are some examples of what I've "studied" in previous initiatory experiences, and the resulting uplevel of my skills and mastery (in bold):

• Stepping away from my connection to Spirit, to fully claiming and embodying my holy nature as a Divine Embodied Being, before anything else.

• Questioning my belonging in community, to feeling more connected to a tribe of like-hearted people.

• Abandoning my power, to fully stepping into the expansive potential of my personal magic and my gifts, and using my power with ease.

• Feeling abandoned by loved ones and community, to cultivating healthy relationships with a group of supportive humans who I know have my back.

• Home and financial crisis, to internalizing my sense of safety so I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I have what I need, and resulting stability and abundance.

• Not trusting myself and my intuition, to always standing by what my inner wisdom tells me, even if other people don't believe me or listen. I trust myself fully, no matter what.

• Embodying the Wounded Healer archetype, to embodying the Empowered Healer archetype and stepping into my authentic service.

• Receiving manipulation and abuse, to loving myself so much that I only accept loving and compassionate treatment from others.

• Feeling like a powerless victim of my circumstances and my emotions, to being able to confidently draw upon the infinite wellspring of my personal power and life force in order to transmute energy for healing.

• Lack of boundaries, to boundaries, boundaries, boundaries! (Okay, I'm still working on that one in certain areas, but I'm much better than I used to be.)

I feel very confident that I have completely shifted many of these, but there are still a couple lessons that keep showing up in the cosmic syllabus, along with new stuff! I'm so excited about this learning opportunity, I could scream!!!!!!!

Do you know the best part? Every time we return to the school of Shamanic Underworld Initiation, we have more tools. We have additional perspective and information from the intervening years, we have more people in our corner to support us, and we have even more capacity to move a massive amount of energy. Best of all in this case, I actually know what underworld initiations are now, and I know how to let myself go into them without completely losing my shit (there are moments where it gets a little dicey, but I'm much better at being uncomfortable than I used to be). Don't worry--if it feels like you're dying, it's because you are!

How do we get into the school of Shamanic Underworld Initiation?

...why? Are you thinking, "that sounds great! I want to go to that kind of school."

If so:

1. You're crazy. You do not want to volunteer for this kind of learning if you can do it in a different way.

2. You don't choose the school of Shamanic Underworld Initiation. It chooses you, whether you like it or not.

You might be thinking, "But, Michelle! You sound kind of excited about this. What gives?"

Well, friend, I wouldn't say I'm "excited." Again, it's super uncomfortable and I definitely would prefer to not be having this experience. But it is fair to say that I'm leaning into it with a certain degree of good humor and "fuck it, let's do this." I can guarantee you that I fought tooth and nail to avoid going into this underworld initiation, and hahahahaaaa of course that didn't work. But now that I'm here, I am going to make the best of it and seize the opportunity for some major lessons in Mastery! (I keep flashing back to May: this is exactly the feeling I had when I didn't make it on the ferry back from Orcas Island and had a 7-hour wait at the ferry dock. I genuinely felt as cool as a cucumber and in good humor, even though I 10000% would rather have been on the ferry. I made the best of it and did fine once I was in the experience.)

What are some tools for a successful Underworld Initiation?

I'm so glad you asked! Based on my experience, here are some of the most important things you can do, regardless of your particular lessons:

• Do not avoid your process. Do not avoid your pain. Whatever it is, be present with your feelings and allow yourself to completely receive their gifts and messages. Even the most painful circumstances hold powerful medicine, and you'll miss it if you're distracted.

• That being said, it's okay to step back from your process every now and then! Go watch a movie. Hang out with friends. (It's a balance. Don't overdo the checking out, but don't be a masochist hero.)

• Reflection is an amazing tool: journaling, meditation, counseling, talking with friends.

• ...but make sure to receive inputs of new information and energy so you're not just spinning around in your own shit! Read articles, get perspectives from different people, tune in to my podcast (link below), get some outside wisdom.

• Move energy on all levels: physical, mental, emotional, Spiritual. Make sure you have practices to support this (movement practice, breathwork, mantra, crying, journaling, energy healing). I AM Alchemy is a great resource for all of these.

• Ask for help. Whether it's from loved ones, community, or a professional, it is vitally important to receive support and remember that you are loved.

• Remember that if it feels like you're dying, it's because you are: the old version of your Self and your life is dying. Yes, it hurts. Yes, it's okay to grieve this. But keep in mind that you're growing into something new and you get to claim it whenever you're ready.

You know what? After writing all of this, I actually am kind of excited. I can look back on previous rounds of "school" and see how they were instrumental in my personal and energetic education. As a result of these Shamanic Underworld Initiations, I received concentrated growth and learning within short periods of time. I have these initiatory experiences to thank for aligning me with the process of Alchemy (applications for I AM Alchemy are now open), cultivating a comfortable relationship with Death and Sacred Destruction, and coming into strong allyship with associated spirit guides and deities. Some of my strongest medicine comes from these experiences.

I know that these periods of my life when I was most uncomfortable were also incredibly valuable training grounds for my gifts, my resilience and my ability to work with big energy. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

(Have you experienced Underworld Initiation and wish you had more tools for next time? Are you experiencing one right now? I recommend applying for I AM Alchemy to give you tools and support to move through these lessons!

Many blessings,

Inspiration

Energetic Regulation is Not Just for Empaths

...it's for anyone who wants to understand their own energy and cultivate an empowered personal practice. Do you know anyone who needs that?

We might think our personal practice supports us fully, but in my 15+ years of training and work, I've found that one key area is missing from most people's practice, and that essential component is Energetic Regulation. Being able to regulate our energies directly affects our health and well-being on the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual levels, and is usually overlooked in most forms of personal practice.

What is Energetic Regulation?

Even if you have some idea of how energy works or have even studied healing work, Energetic Regulation may not be a part of your practice. Energetic Regulation is both the practice of long-term energetic maintenance, and identifying specific imbalances in your personal energy field and making appropriate adjustments using the 4 Keys of Energetic Regulation.

When your energy is regulated, your energy body is fully online and empowered.

What would be possible for you if your energy were fully Empowered? Do you know what that feels like?

We live in a world where, for the most part, our energies are out of balance and not fully empowered. We walk on concrete, drive around in cars, talk on phones, stare at screens and eat processed food. We may interface with people who are angry, frustrated, unhealthy and out of balance. The more unbalanced we are, the more support we need to regulate and empower our energies!

Needing to regulate your energy doesn't mean that you're doing anything wrong. Regulating your energy is a necessary maintenance that supports your health and well-being on the physical, mental, emotional and Spiritual levels.

If you need to regulate your energy, you might:

• Feel depleted, tired, fatigued or drained

• Feel anxious, scattered, having trouble focusing or making decisions

• Be more likely to take on other people’s energy, feel angry or depressed

• Feel like you’re “stuck in your head,” disconnected from your body and your heart

• Have trouble connecting with others, not able to access your intuition

• Feel overwhelmed, insecure, or want to “check out”

• Have a strong personal practice and generally feel good, but like there's something "off" and you're not sure what

Your Energy Body, Empowered!

Good news! If you’re feeling any of those things above, that’s totally normal because of the world we live in. Even better news: there’s a simple solution, and that’s what this training is all about! Using regulation practices to maintain a healthy energy body is a life-long practice that requires awareness and commitment. Just like any other skill, the more you practice, the easier and more effortless it becomes. When you clear, ground, cultivate and protect your energies, you might:

• Feel energized, rested, resourced and comfortable

• Feel more confident, secure, focused and stable

• Feel more physical health and vitality

• Experience better sleep and relaxation

• Have healthy boundaries, feel happier and connect more easily with others

• Have a healthy connection with your body and your emotions

• Develop a healthy connection with your intuition

• Feel capable, alert and engaged in your life

• Have greater capacity to support your clients and people in your life

How would it feel if you had the tools and resources to build an Empowered foundation for your personal energy and your practice? What difference would it make for you if you understood how to regulate your energy field? How would it help you feel more empowered in your life, and enable you to show up more fully?

What would be possible for you if your energy were fully Empowered?

Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a Fully Empowered Master of Transformation?

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

The Empowered Healer Checklist

Over my 15+ years of training and practice, I've found that there are a few key essentials that make all the difference both in my personal practice and in my ability to offer healing to others. These were essential skills that I imparted during my 7 years teaching Reiki, and continue to teach to my private clients and Alchemy students.

...Do you want to know what they are???
 

How do you know if you're an Empowered healer?
Use the Empowered Healer checklist to find out!

The Empowered Healer Checklist

Every Empowered Healer should feel confident in these 5 key areas:

1. Energetic Anatomy: You know how energy naturally moves through the body and energy centers. You can identify different layers of your energy body, direct flow of energy and tell if something is out of alignment.

2. Clearing energy: You can comfortably and confidently use purging, releasing and cleansing techniques to clear the different energy bodies. You know how to clear trapped emotion, old energetic residue, other people's energy and stagnation.

3. Grounding energy: You know how to safely ground into Earthly and embodied energies. You know how to return all parts of your energy back to your body and create a solid container.

4. Cultivating energy: You feel confident building and cultivating your energy field. You know how to increase the vibration and the amount of energy in your field, and safely work with it.

5. Protecting energy: You know how to create a non-defensive protective field. You feel comfortable setting and asserting energetic boundaries, especially in stressful or chaotic surroundings. You know how to keep your energies safe.

If you answered an enthusiastic YES to all of these, congratulations! You're an Empowered Healer!

Were there some points where you didn't feel so confident? Did you see some areas where you would like to grow and feel more comfortable?

Applications for I AM Alchemy are now open. Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a Fully Empowered Master of Transformation?

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

Journal/Meditation prompts:
 

Who am I as an Empowered Healer?
What dreams do I have for myself in my Healing abilities?
What do I need to learn or be in order for that to happen?

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

What does it mean to Master Your Craft?

How do you know when you have?

Whether or not you're currently a practitioner (healer, bodyworker, yoga teacher, coach, naturopath, etc), we all have a craft. And I know, since you're here, that you have a vision for what is possible by mastering your craft.

One of the biggest fallacies I have seen over and over in my practice (and one that I have been guilty of, myself) is one that continues to plague the Spiritual and self-development community. And it drives me effing bonkers.

Maybe you know someone like this. Maybe you've been in this position, too! Either way, I share this with you because I believe it's one of the most fundamental components for any practitioner. The fallacy is this: many people try to master their craft without the internal process of mastering themselves.

I've shared articles with you before about the path of Self Mastery and its implications on our personal and professional lives. In fact, I designed a year-long intensive training course that helps empowered practitioners master their Craft by mastering themSelves. If you want to trust yourself as a practitioner, feel confident in your intuitive gifts and your service, build a thriving practice that supports your life and create the biggest possible impact for your clients and for the world...

Turn your energies inward.

Come home to yourself.

Master your craft by mastering your Self.
 

How do we do this, exactly? What do Masterful Practitioners have in common?

Funny you should ask! I wrote a guide for you that answers that very question:
7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft. (Don't let the name fool you--it's all about Self-Mastery.) This guide offers 7 things that all Masterful Practitioners incorporate into their practice, as well as journal and meditation prompts for you so you can incorporate them into your own practice!

Scroll down for the guide. Happy integration!

Many blessings,

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

Strong and Consistent Personal Practice

In order for them to be effective and powerful in their work, masterful practitioners know that they must cultivate health and vitality in all areas of their life: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Personal practice serves as a microcosm for the rest of our lives, and masterful practitioners prioritize their personal practice so they can successfully support their own energies as well as their clients.

Journal/meditation prompt: What do I do every day that supports my health and vitality? What specifically does this practice do for my body, my mind, my heart and my spirit? What fills me up the most?
 

Radical Self Awareness and Continual Inquiry

Masterful practitioners know themselves from the inside out, and they know that there is no “arrival.” We are never “done” our process of actualization and development—the best way to support our clients and be effective changemakers in the world is to remain in close contact with our own process so we can ensure that we’re showing up authentically, fully and clearly.

Journal/meditation prompt: Tune in with the subtleties of your body and your energy field. What do you notice? Are there any hidden, trapped emotions or beliefs that show up? How can you create space to get to “know yourself” and who you are becoming every day?
 

Self-Trust

This is different from blind faith or confidence: masterful practitioners trust themselves because they know themselves well (see previous point) and have lived experience of their own capability, capacity and resourcefulness. Even if the circumstance is new, masterful practitioners trust themselves to call upon their reservoirs of self-awareness and life experience to effectively navigate the situation.

Journal/meditation prompt: State the affirmation, “I trust myself completely.” As you do so, notice what sensations or emotions arise for you. Ask yourself, in what ways do I trust myself? In what ways do I not trust myself? How do I relate to self-trust? How do I want to embody self-trust?
 

Congruence

The way we do something is the way we do everything. Masterful practitioners embody congruence, meaning that all areas of their life and practice exhibit consistent traits and principles. A non-congruent practitioner might teach nutrition and self-care, but go home every night to binge on sugar and television. A congruent practitioner fully embodies and aligns with their practice in all areas.

Journal/meditation prompt: How am I embodying and aligning with my practice every day? In what areas am I congruent? In what areas am I incongruent? What action steps do I need to take in order to come into congruent alignment?
 

Practice is Fully Grounded and Integrated

Masterful practitioners have a seemingly effortless relationship with their practice. Their work seems to flow through and from them, as an extension of their very being. This “effortlessness” actually comes from having processed and integrated their work so deeply that every cell, every facet of consciousness and every action aligns with their practice. This energy and wisdom live fully in their body, and they draw upon it without having to think about it.

Journal/meditation prompt: How have I integrated and grounded my work? To what extent is my practice fully embodied? What remains to be integrated? What steps do I need to take to ground in my work?
 

Less Is More

Have you ever been around a practitioner who simply seems to help you feel brighter by their mere presence? The energies are subtle, words are few and precise, but incredibly effective. Masterful practitioners know that less is more: they do less and have more impact. By filling a session with doing, there is less room for being. Masterful practitioners know that true healing and growth
happens in the spaces between doing, and create plenty of room for being.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to doing? What is my relationship to being? How can I do less in order to be more effective and have more impact?
 

Healthy Relationship with Shadow

All Lightworkers must have a healthy, grounded relationship with Shadow as a sacred ally. Masterful practitioners know that “negative” emotions and energies are neither good nor bad, but merely represent one polarity of the spectrum. Instead of demonizing the Shadow, masterful practitioners welcome it as a valued teacher. They have an active working partnership with Death and the Sacred Destroyer, and know that Shadow may also work in service to love.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to Shadow? What does this say about me? How do I want to relate to Shadow? How is Shadow an ally in my life and practice?

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a fully empowered Master of Transformation?
>>>Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

Walking the Path

"Go big, or go home!"

"No pain, no gain!"

We're all familiar with these statements, and others that also glorify intensity, drama and suffering. I definitely used to be a member of the Harder/Better/Faster/Stronger camp. I think it was a combination of my desire for efficiency, my highly competitive nature and the need to receive instant gratification in knowing that my efforts had achieved some immediately measurable result.

It took me an embarrassingly long time (until around 2015 or so), but I finally learned that healing doesn't work that way. (Facepalm.) In many ways, I almost felt exempt from the Universal Laws of subtle energy movements—see aforementioned competitive nature. "If anyone can heal overnight, it's me! I'll just do this one big ritual and I'll be good!" Then Spirit would kick my butt in some form or another and I would be forced to slow down, work on the subtleties and not try to rush anything or create some grand Hail Mary healing gesture.

There were times when I was moving through deep healing crisis, and the only thing I could do to work on myself was some mini personal practice, but I committed to doing it every day. One of the most gratifying examples of this took place in 2015 as I experienced the trials of the Portland housing market and had no idea where I was going to live. During that time, I received a healing session, and the practitioner told me that my Root Chakra was almost entirely shut down. I remember thinking, "That can't be right. I'm very grounded." But as I considered this information, I realized that I hadn't adjusted my personal practices to accommodate the destabilization I felt from losing my home. I silently promised myself in that moment to work on my Root Chakra and my sense of safety every day, even if only for five minutes.

When I saw this healer again a month later, she noted that my Root Chakra was not only fully back online, but huge! Also, all of my other Chakras were more balanced and aligned because of the work I had been doing on my Root Chakra alone. Aside from the measurable difference in my energy field, I felt emotionally safer and I was more secure and confident, despite the upheaval in my living situation. I had worked every day for a few minutes on internalizing my sense of safety, rather than having my safety be dependent on external circumstances, and it had profound effects on my energy body and personal well-being.

I realized, after grasping the enormous value of subtlety and consistency (especially in personal practice), that I was not the only person who believed that healing needed to be a dramatic, grand-gesture experience. In a later conversation with a friend of mine, we got around to talking about energy clearing. I perceived that his field was a bit "dusty" and asked him what he did for a clearing practice. "You mean like a sweat lodge?" He asked. I answered that a sweat lodge was a good way to do some bigger clearing, but asked again what he did every day for himself. "Oh. Nothing," he answered. At this point Spirit started poking me with a very direct message, so I asked him, "Do you believe that subtle daily practices actually work?" He looked a bit taken aback as he thought for a moment, then, almost sheepishly, answered, "I guess not."

We all like magic fixes. We like thinking that there's one golden gem of a ritual or practice that we can bring in to clean up our energies and erase all the wounds. That's why there are so many "Intensives" out there in the healing and coaching world. There are plenty of retreats, ceremonies and other ways to experience a supercharged dose of healing. There is absolutely incredible value in dropping into your process and doing nothing else for one day, three days, five days, a week, or longer, but unless your awareness of the subtleties and your established personal practice is there to back it up, it is not sustainable and the energies won't stick around. While much less sexy, the subtle consistency of your daily personal practice is going to be the thing that saves your butt and creates the solid foundation for all other healing work to take place.

I guarantee you that the subtle work that you do every single day will be one of your greatest tools. This is what will allow you to become intimately acquainted with your energies, your process, your intuition and help you cultivate a strong energetic foundation. It is this foundation that will provide a clear container for whatever intensive healing, magic, coaching or ceremonial work you do, and give you a place to channel that infusion of new energy. One of the things I tell my clients (have you and I had this conversation?) is, "Doing a subtle practice two minutes every day for 30 days is more powerful than doing one hour of practice once a month."

How can you harness your own power of subtlety? Check this out:
 

A Personal Practice Primer
for Lightworkers

Congratulations! You're ready to develop or enhance your subtle personal practice. Here are some things to consider:

• Support: it's a good idea to receive some support in the form of healing work or mentorship to help you determine the best direction for your personal practice. (Want support? Let's talk!)

• Time: how much time can you commit every day to this practice? I tell my clients to choose something in the range of 2 minutes to 1 hour. Choose the amount of time that you confidently feel you can commit to every single day. If there are some days where you do more than that, that's great! But at very least, you are setting aside that minimum amount of time.

• Intention: what is the goal of your practice? What would you like your practice to help you do? If your goal is to use your practice to establish strong boundaries, you will likely need a different practice than if you wanted to cultivate your intuition.

• The practice itself: what are you actually doing during that timeframe? In addition to your intention, part of what dictates your practice is the amount of time you allot. For example, if you give yourself an hour, that's enough time for some journaling, breathing meditation, embodiment practices and affirmations. If you give yourself 10 minutes, maybe a brief visualization and affirmation practice would be more appropriate. If you give yourself two minutes, you can create a brief, but rich practice of silence, gratitude and simply being present in your body.

Here are some suggestions of a few things that you might want to consider weaving into your personal practice:

• Self-healing work (energy healing, Reiki, chakra balance)

• Breathwork

• Meditation (visualization, mindfulness, Shamanic journey)

• Gratitude

• Affirmations

• Journaling

• Embodiment practice (exercise, walking, gentle movement, stretching, yoga)

• Silence

• Gardening

• Artwork or creative process

It's also important to change up your personal practice every now and then so it doesn't become stagnant. But for now, just pick something and stick with it!

Applications for I AM Alchemy are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Journal/Meditation Prompts:
 

What is my Personal Practice? How do I feel about it? What does it do for me? What do I want my Personal Practice to do for me? What changes can I make to achieve this?

The Intersection of Spirituality and Science

I AM Alchemy represents something quite phenomenal, and deeply personal. What now exists as a year-long intensive training course in practical magic began as me following my intuitive guidance to work with the natural energies of transformation. From the time I was very young, this way of looking at the world has simply made the most sense to me. When I first began officially studying and practicing Shamanism in 2003, my natural inclinations were confirmed by an Earth-based way of knowing that is older than recorded history itself.

I was always interested in healing, science, magic, personal inquiry and the miracle of nature, and I discovered while I was in high school that these concepts had a very natural intersection. I continued my education and investigation. While earning my undergraduate degree in Animal Physiology and Behavior, I simultaneously completed my Reiki Master training and furthered my Shamanic studies. I walked the paths of magic and of science at the same time, and discovered that they ultimately led to the same place: back to that same world view that I’d had as a child, but with all the benefits of the added wisdom of life experience.

I AM Alchemy is simply a synthesis of this world view. That which I took for granted as a child (the sacredness of life itself, the magic that exists in all beings, the power and utter majesty of the Earth) now takes on new significance through the lens of where the path has taken me through the study of life. As I grew beyond my young innocence, I learned that not everyone experiences the world in this way… but that people are hungry for it again, and the time has come for us to reclaim this Sacred Work.

This course is a revolution not only in of the body of knowledge itself, but also in the way that we relate to knowledge. Science and Spiritual practice have more in common than we might think: both are means of discovering Truth, both emphasize inquiry and research, both honor the contributions of our ancestors (physical, energetic and intellectual) and both, in their purest form, serve to uplift, empower and inspire all beings.

These two paths of Science and Spirituality were once a unified journey. The investigation of Life took place just as much within the heart as within the lab. Modern chemistry, medicine and principles of physics were born from the research of Spiritual practitioners as they sought to identify God in the world around them. Throughout history, Alchemists are noted not only for their philosophical and Spiritual work, but their contributions to the scientific community. Alchemy is one of the few (if not the only) practices that has maintained a foot in both worlds.

However, these paths drifted apart, and the worlds of Science and Spirit grew to vilify each other. History is riddled with examples of the scientific community looking upon Spiritual practitioners with disdain, and just as many examples of the Spiritual community rejecting the findings of Science. The path of Science shifted in the Yang direction of logic, linear thinking, reason and structure, and Spiritual practice as a whole moved in the Yin direction of fluidity, passivity and suppression in the outer world. The Spiritual collective had lost its structure, and Science had lost its soul.

We are at a turning point in the evolution of the planet where we have the opportunity to bring these fields once more into collaboration and support of each other. I firmly believe, having walked both paths, that this is one of the fundamental pieces necessary in order for us to live a life of fully empowered creatorship. In order to truly actualize the world of our hearts and dreams, our relationship to knowing must include both the evidence-based experience, and the power of faith.

The time for knowledge that exists only in the thinking, rational state is over. Now is the time of feeling, embodied wisdom and subtle perception.

The time for retreating into an oblivious bliss state and separating from the physical realm is over. Now is the time of sovereignty, discernment and returning magic to the workings of Earth.

I AM Alchemy operates as a training in practical magic through the paths of both Science and Spirituality. Throughout this course, we’ll be using the principles of scientific inquiry: asking really good questions, tracking data (lots of journaling and opportunities to reflect on trends), moving along a trajectory of investigation and grounding our results into our lived experience. We’ll also be working with principles of Spiritual practice: honoring the immediacy and multifaceted nature of Truth, taking time for reverence and pure connection, inviting Spirit into our lives and living in alignment with the sacredness all around us.

My greatest wish for this work is that it serves to help usher in a new way of being on this planet—one that honors the sacredness of life and also gives us a road map for how to live in this world.

May this work support your own journey of sacred unfolding as you come home to yourself.

May this work support the freedom, sovereignty and health of all beings on Earth.

We do this work for the benefit of ourselves, of all those around us, of all beings on Earth and of the Earth Herself.
 

Ready to apply for the course?

Apply here>>http://joyofenergy.com/i-am-alchemy

What is the core purpose of your calling?

What is the core purpose of our calling?

For all of us Soul Aligned humans out there, living "on purpose" is a significant component of our awareness. Whether you're a professional Lightworker Soulpreneur, or a Lightworker spreading love through your life path, awareness of our Sacred Purpose is a compass point we all attune to in order to stay true to our inner North.

...and yet, what is the greater purpose that we serve by following our calling? Does that get lost in the shuffle? If we're tuning in to the compass point of our calling, what is the ultimate "destination?"

Last week I had a conversation with a woman who wanted to put on a workshop around compassionate communication. After listening to her ideas and thoughts, I reflected back to her that I didn't hear a very clear idea of the purpose behind her workshop. She replied with confusion that she would have thought the purpose was obvious: we're all human and it's a good thing to communicate with compassion.

As we discussed further, it became apparent that while she felt the calling of offering her Compassionate Communication workshop, she was not clearly connected to the core purpose that this workshop would serve in the greater context... of her work, and of her own Sacred Purpose. I lead her through an exercise called "For what purpose?" so that she could have a clearer view of not only this individual workshop, but of her work as a puzzle piece within the larger whole.

Lightworker, what is the core purpose of your calling? How do you connect not only with the immediate steps in front of you, but with how this calling serves a purpose beyond you? What is your personal contribution as a piece in the cosmic puzzle?

Having access to this awareness provides us not only with the calling immediately in front of us, but with some context around the ultimate, core purpose of why we are orienting ourselves to this particular North.

Would you like to know exactly where your inner compass is leading you? If you would like to practice the "For what purpose?" exercise, here is the formula and an example:

Our "For what purpose?" formula goes as follows:

1. Statement A.

2. Statement A, for what purpose?

3. Statement A, so that Statement B.

4. Statement B, for what purpose?

5. Statement B, so that Statement C.

6. Statement C, for what purpose?

7. Statement C, so that Statement D... until you reach the point where there is no higher purpose.

You get the idea. Let me give you an example:

1. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy: Master Alchemist Training.

2. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy, for what purpose?

3. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy so that my students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts.

4. So that my students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts, for what purpose?

5. My students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts, so that they can come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship.

6. So that my students can come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship, for what purpose?

7. My students may come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship, so that they are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth.

8. So that my students are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth, for what purpose?

9. My students are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth, so that all beings on Earth and the Earth herself may be aligned to the frequency of love.

Your turn to try it!

...and I would love to hear from you! If you feel called, please comment once you have completed the exercise and let me know what you discovered in that exercise!

From one Lightworker living "on purpose" to another, keep it up!

Applications for I AM Alchemy are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Many blessings,

What is the filter of the guidance you're receiving?

Self Mastery

Original Medicine: the purest, most authentic expression of one's core essence (the I AM).

Original Medicine: the actualization and translation of the core essence into one's lived experience.

It's amazing how the core essence of who we are and what we're doing in the world can be right in front of our faces, and yet it sometimes takes years of practice, learning, falling down and peeling back the layers to see it properly and remember who we are.

Sound familiar?

As a child, I lived my Medicine effortlessly. I spoke fluently with animals and nature, I saw energies and played with the life force all around me. I intuitively worked with crystals and offered healing energy, all before the time I was 12 years old.

My Original Medicine came from sheer Grace, innocence and an uninhibited dance with Spirit.

I never fully stepped away from my sense of Self, but as I grew older, I started to realize that not everyone experienced magic the way I did. Thus began my journey of hiding my heart, of playing it cool and trying to fit in.

When I began studying and practicing Shamanism at age 15, I only told my immediate family.

When I began my Reiki training while earning a degree in biology at University, I pretended not to care when my classmates scoffed at my suggestions that perhaps energy healing might have a role to play in modern medicine.

When I traveled and lived abroad, I was careful not to let anyone observe me praying and living my magic, because I was already an outsider.

Throughout all that time, even though it took place under the surface, I learned to consciously understand and work with my Medicine. I received initiations, I listened to guidance from mentors, I practiced my intuition, I honed my abilities and brought the understanding of my Medicine into my mind.

I had become a student of my Medicine, but I still hadn't claimed it fully.

I started publicly practicing and offering my work to the world. I flexed my healer muscles and began to implement what I had learned.

Suddenly, I was thrust into a Dark Night of the Soul initiation cycle. I entered one of the most traumatic periods in my life, when it felt like I might lose everything: my family, my community, my health, my trust, my life and my connection with Spirit.

In this Dark Night of the Soul, it was my Original Medicine that saved me.

Even though I had fallen so far that I had almost forgotten who I was, I still experienced flickers of magic that helped me remember just enough. The call and power of my Medicine gave me the strength to claw myself out of a dangerous situation, and begin the arduous journey of healing my wounds of forgetting.

For that period, I had stepped away from who I was. I had abandoned my true nature, my innate wisdom and I had placed myself in harm's way.

As soon as I remembered who I was, the power of my Medicine came flooding back.

Over the past several years, I have grown from an Adept in my Original Medicine to a Master of Self.

I have brought my work back into Spirit, returned to a state of ease and once again felt that effortless embodiment of magic.

As I reclaim my own Self Mastery, I once again feel the Grace and effortlessness that I had experienced in my Original Medicine as a child.

But this time, that Grace comes from a full-circle investigation of my Original Medicine.

It comes from consciously recognizing and choosing every day to walk my path.

It comes from Self Mastery.

It comes from who I AM.

...just as YOUR own Self Mastery comes from your I AM.

As I consciously claim my Self Mastery and connect ever more deeply with who I AM…

...I AM witnessing people find the courage to remember who they are and not shrink from the greatness of their purpose.

...I AM guiding Lightworkers to fully understand and trust their innate wisdom, and feel empowered to know that who they are and what they are is enough.

...I AM supporting fellow empaths, intuitives, healers and practitioners as they rediscover their Original Medicine and their most authentic service.

...I AM watching people claim their role as the magical creators of their lives.

...I AM witnessing leaders and changemakers step up with conviction to usher in a new Earth.

I AM...

A SHAMAN

I walk in both worlds of Earth and Spirit, and hold the wisdom of the ancestors. I guide you to attune to the power of your own lineage.

A LIGHTWORKER

I AM here to resonate the frequency of a New Earth by embodying and shining my Heart Light, and helping you find this light within yourself.

AN ALCHEMIST

I know and align with the cycles of transformation, and teach you this process so that you may Alchemize yourself into the true gold of an awakened soul.

A CHANGEMAKER

I AM a master of the cycles of creation and destruction, of Shamanic Death and Rebirth. I support you through these rites of passage as you come into the fullest expression of who you are.

A CREATOR

I have orchestrated the birth of many worlds, and I AM here to hold you in your power as Magical Creator of your own.

A MENTOR

I embody the lessons of this and all my lifetimes so that I may shepherd you through your own teachings and initiations.

A HUMAN

I AM here to love Earth and all her children. I AM here to help us rediscover Spirit in every cell of a living planet. I AM here to witness and honor you as you walk your own, sacred path of becoming.

What This Means for You

You might be thinking at this point: "Okay, now I know more about Michelle and where she's coming from. But how does that impact me?"

My journey of Self Mastery impacts you because:

• I believe that you already have everything you need, and that deep down, you already know who you are. There is nothing I can give you that you do not already have access to, but I can help you find the way.

• The world needs you to live your Sacred Purpose. I know that part of mine is to help you remember and live yours.

• Part of your path is to fully understand, trust and live your innate wisdom. I've been there, and I have some amazing tools to help you.

• You are invited to bring ALL of your Self to our work together. Every single part of you is welcome in our conversations, because it's all a part of your journey. Even the crunchy, shadowy bits. (Especially those.)

• There is no such thing as singular Truth. What is true for me may not be true for you, and there is enough room for that in our container for that to be the case.

I hope that gave you a little bit of insight into where I'm coming from when I offer guidance, inspiration and perspective! I highly encourage you to take a moment to consider the filter of your source whenever you find yourself seeking guidance... whether it's from a loved one, from a mentor, from the internet or from Spirit. Please know that the filter is just as important as the guidance itself.

For my part, it is an honor to be a part of your journey. Thank you for choosing to include me on your path of Self Mastery. I hope you receive what you're looking for, and maybe even something you didn't know you needed.

If you would like some guidance regarding your own journey of Self Mastery, please see below for some journal and meditation prompts!

Applications for I AM Alchemy 2020 are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Many blessings,

Meditation Prompt (use as mantra or sit with this idea and see what comes up):

"I know who I AM.
I know what I AM.
I know how I serve."

Journal Prompt:

"What does my I AM Presence want me to know about mySelf? How does my I AM presence want to be expressed in the world?

A Letter to My Fellow Seekers

Dear Seeker,

I see you. I see your fire, your drive and your commitment to uncover more and more of the mysteries through walking your path on this Earth. I see your journey.

I also see your doubt, your fear, your uncertainty. I see you when you feel alone, and when it feels as though you are lost.

I see you because I AM you.

I have been exactly where you are right now. I have felt the call of something I didn't fully understand, but knew I had to follow. I have felt overwhelmed, unprepared and as though I don't know where to go for help. I have felt simultaneously filled with excitement and aliveness as I connected with something bigger than me, and also terrified by the idea of what following this path might cost me.

I'm here to tell you, Seeker, that the cost of NOT following this path is far greater.

Right now, maybe you're feeling like you don't even know where to start. Maybe you're not sure anyone will understand, or you're worried society won't accept the empowered magnificence of your fully expressed Self, or you're afraid people will just think you're plain batsh*t crazy.

But deep down, you know that you want to remember who you are. More than anything, you want to fully know yourSelf and understand your own, unique gifts. You want to remember your purpose and live your Soul Mission. You want to trust yourSelf and your path. You want to feel confident in your Self, your gifts and your Sacred Purpose.

Seeker, I see you. I want you to know that I am right here, walking the path with you. And after thousands of conversations supporting fellow Lightworkers like yourself, I am here to tell you:

You are not alone.

You, along with your Sacred Purpose, your gifts and your Soul Mission, belong here.

You are supported in your journey--by your Highest Self, by Spirit... and by me. Your global Tribe is here for you.

You've got this. You are capable, empowered, whole and healed. You already have everything you need.

You are loved beyond measure. Your life is a sacred unfolding, and you are exactly where you need to be.

I see you, Seeker. Keep it up! From one Bright Lightworker to another, you look great out there.

If you are ready to step into your own commitments to the path, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to answer your deep soul calling to live your purpose... If you are ready to step into fulfillment of your Soul Contract and commitments... If you are ready to remember who you truly are, claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Applications are now open! Apply here: I AM Alchemy

Many blessings,

Inspiration:

"Sagittarius"

Artwork by AquaSixio, from the Dancing Zodiac series

Freedom Through Commitment

What are your commitments?

What a beautiful weekend! My students and I just finished three days of deep-dive magic and practice at our third I AM Alchemy retreat.

...and I feel so much clarity.

This course is one of the most aligned, authentic components of my business to date. Within the framework of I AM Alchemy, there are teachings, structures and syllabus. But one of the things I love most about teaching a body of knowledge based in practical, real-time magic is the freedom.

Read on for one of the highlight takeaways from the weekend! You can apply this tool to uplevel and receive clarity in your own practice!

General applications for I AM Alchemy 2019 are now open. Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of commitment to Self, Spirit and your practice... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you. Apply here: I AM Alchemy

I admit that part of me was a tad apprehensive last year at the idea of offering a year-long course, especially at the idea of being tied to a syllabus. One of the things I value most in my business is the flexibility I have to offer what feels most lit-up, and sometimes that can change from year to year, or season to season.

But the thing about this course is, it is a life force of its own, and as such, it has a process of evolution and growth within the body of knowledge itself. I AM Alchemy is not a dry, scripted teaching from a dusty book. It is a vital, living entity that has its own energy flow and plan. Someone asked me recently how I organize and offer my teachings, and the most honest response was simply, "I listen to what wants to be shared."

This is the difference between teaching and stewardship. Yes, I have a plan. Yes, I have a course outline and documents and structure. But more important than this is the capacity to listen and to transmit what wants to come through, and knowing that it will be exactly the right thing for my students.

Ultimately, my role in this process is to simply pass along the messages. As a steward of this mystery school, part of my job is to be quiet and allow myself to be guided, so that I can guide my students in turn. This is my commitment to Spirit and to Alchemy itself, and as long as I practice this work, I honor this commitment. As long as I honor this commitment, I have the freedom I desire in my practice.

My commitments to this body of knowledge allow me to be an active participant in the mystery, which always feels like the most lit-up path.

In preparation for the retreat, I asked my students to write their own commitments. This practice is our way of making a contract of sorts with ourselves and with the work. We witnessed each other in our commitments during ceremony, and the power that came from this practice blew myself and everyone away.

What happens when we make these commitments? What happens when we spell out in writing what we are signing up for as a Lightworker on this planet?

What are your commitments?

Here some of are mine. Check out below for the prompts I offered my students if you would like to write your own.

As an Alchemist, I commit...

As an Alchemist, I commit to holding myself in trust and compassion through change as I discover and know fully all parts of my Self. I commit to bringing magic to every facet of my life.

As an Alchemist, I commit to bringing more subtlety, intentionality, precision and grace to my work. I commit to redefining my personal practice to align more supportively and harmoniously with my well-being.

As an Alchemist, I commit to carrying out the operations of the Sun, Moon and Earth here on this planet for the Highest and Greatest Good of all beings.

As an Alchemist, I commit to being an instrument and steward of this body of knowledge, to ensuring its path in the modern world, and to honoring and participating in this cycle, always. I commit to holding the torch so that those who are ready may find the path. I commit to listening always to this work, and offering teachings in alignment with the instruction I receive.

If you are ready to step into your own commitments to the path, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to answer your deep soul calling to live your purpose... If you are ready to step into fulfillment of your Soul Contract and commitments... If you are ready to remember who you truly are, claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Applications are now open! Apply here: I AM Alchemy

Many blessings,

Journal prompt:

What are my commitments to my Self?
What are my commitments to my practice?
What are my commitments to Spirit?
What do I need in order to honor those commitments?

Self Mastery: The Alchemist's Path

Dear Tribe,

Thank you for continuing to ask the Big Questions. You know the ones I mean...

"Who am I?"
"What is my purpose?"
"What the f*** am I doing with my life?"

If you're asking these questions, you're in the right place.

I enjoyed two deep-dive days last weekend with a mentor of mine looking at some of these Big Questions, but honestly, my biggest takeaway wasn't an answer, and it wasn't even a question in itself:

My biggest takeaway was learning WHY I was asking Big Questions.

One of the teachings we visited over the weekend was the 6 Core Drivers of Human Behavior (originally from Tony Robbins). I was already familiar with these drivers, but something landed for me in a new way when I looked at my primary driver: Significance.

"People who are driven by Significance are those who crave Mastery of their lives," my mentor said.

I had always taken for granted my interest in self-inquiry and Self Mastery, but never before put the idea together with an archetypal driver of my behavior that impacts my choices, my world view and how I offer my work in the world.

You see, this weekend I learned that not only do I want to know myself and practice the path of Self Mastery, but:

I want it to matter.

I want my journey to be important and serve other people.

I want the questions I ask myself and the path of self-knowledge to ripple out farther beyond me than I could ever imagine.

I want the path of Self Mastery to be available to all who seek it.

If you are seeking this path of Self Mastery, read on.

"What you seek is seeking you." ~Rumi

I AM: The One Presence, the God Body, Christ Consciousness; the identification, resonance and expression of the Divine Self.

"Know thyself."

You're probably familiar with this idea.

This particular maxim has appeared in many philosophical and literary works throughout the ages. Its roots go back to ancient Greece and the Temple of Apollo at Delphi, although some historians cite origins even earlier in the temples of ancient Egypt. More recently than Socrates and Plato, however, we've seen this aphorism show up in the works of Benjamin Franklin, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Carl Jung and even in The Matrix film series.

The theme of self-knowledge, and therefore, Self Mastery, has been one of the governing quests of humanity, if not the ultimate investigative journey. Who has not wondered about their identity, their sense of Self, and their place in the world? In fact, I can guarantee that, if you are reading this email, you have asked yourself in some form, "Who am I?"

I've been there, too. In fact, I'm there right now.

When I was playing with some ideas last year about the course that has since become I AM Alchemy, I found myself asking a lot of Big Questions, among them:

"What is actually the point of this course? What is the goal?"

"What do I want my students to learn or achieve as a result of this course?"

"...what the heck do I call it???" (Okay, maybe this isn't exactly a "Big Question.")

I meditated on these questions as I considered not only Alchemical philosophy and its role in the modern world, but also my personal values and desires as a facilitator of this body of knowledge. After all, we are not separate from the work we offer, and I knew that any teachings (especially transmissions from such a powerful mystery school) would be coming through the filter of my own sense of Self.

The school of Alchemy is primarily known in popular understanding as the process of turning lead into gold, but most people don't realize that gold is not actually the Alchemist's goal. In addition to producing gold, the end result of a successful Alchemical process is the Philosopher's Stone, or Ultima Materia: the perfected, fully actualized state that symbolizes the union between Above and Below, or the Heavenly and Earthly Selves. In the case of the Alchemist, the Philosopher's Stone is the fully actualized Self: the embodied state of our Divine nature... the I AM.

In other words, Self Mastery is the path of the Alchemist.

I knew when I was developing the course last year, and I was reminded over the weekend as I sat with my driver of Significance: I want my journey to serve others, and I want the path of Self Mastery to be available to all those Lightworkers who seek it.

This was my intention in creating this course, and this is my greatest desire for my students: that they remember who they are as fully actualized, Divine Embodied Beings, and that they identify, resonate and express their own I AM Presence for themselves and for the world.

When I said that I'm right there on the path with you, I meant it. I know that by offering this course in I AM Alchemy, by inviting my students to ask Big Questions, by encouraging them to explore and examine every facet of their lives through the lens of Self Mastery and transformation, by leading them through the fires of change and asking them to trust that they will make it out the other side...

I am asking myself some Big Questions.

I am examining every facet of my life through the lens of Self Mastery and not taking anything for granted.

I am walking voluntarily through the fires of change and watching those parts of my life that were no longer aligned burn to the ground.

I am having to trust my Self and my path more than ever before, even when it's hard. Even when it means stepping away from things I love. Even when the outcome isn't guaranteed, but I know that if I didn't try I would regret it for the rest of my life.

...because, on the other side of that, is my I AM.

This is what I want for my Self.

This is what I want for my students.

This is what I want for you, if you choose it.

If you are ready to step into your own path of Self Mastery, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to have clear access to your fully actualized Self... If you are ready to come into the fullest expression of your Divine Nature... If you are ready to claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

"What you seek is seeking you." ~Rumi

Journal prompt:

What am I seeking?
What is seeking me?

Access Your Inner Master Creator

Creatorship: active participation in the natural cycles of Universal energy, from a place of fully empowered BE-ing.

Creation is the natural order of energy. Cycles of creation and destruction hold a healthy, harmonious balance of flow in the world. We see this phenomenon in the cycles of the seasons, in nutrient cycling in nature, in the phases of the moon… you get the idea.

Natural Cycles

Often, when we think about the process of creation, we call to mind the idea of “making something out of nothing.” However, as we know from the first law of thermodynamics (also known as the Law of Conservation of Energy), energy can neither be created nor destroyed, but rather, energy can only be transferred or transformed. Thus, creation originates not from nothing, but from recycling, reorganizing and reforming energy that was already in existence into a different vibration.

Your Active Participation

Universal energy is an infinite source with a will and life force of its own. Since we ourselves are made from this energy, we already have the right and full access to work with life force energy. However, one may ask, “If Universal energy has a will and life force of its own, why is my active participation required?” This is where I’ll insert a tiny rant about Bliss Ninnies. There are people (I’m sure you know someone like this, or know of people like this) who have taken the passive approach to life. They have determined that the Universe has a will of its own and that all things move in accordance with this will, and they have stopped there. Some things these people commonly say include, “Everything is perfect,” “I’m just going with the flow,” and “The Universe will provide, man.”

You may also notice that these people are remarkably ineffective at creating change in their own lives, usually hold a lot of stagnant energy and tend to have poor boundaries.

And yet, they’re not totally wrong, they’ve just taken the passive approach. Let’s examine these statements from the active perspective:

“Everything is perfect, because everything is Source, and I am a perfect embodiment of that same Source.”

“I am consciously moving and aligning with the flow of Divine will.”

“I am clear and empowered in my intentions and desires and the Universe is answering my prayers and providing for me, always.”

What is the difference between these two approaches? Mostly, it’s as simple as paying attention. Your active participation in the cycles of creation is a gift and an invitation. You are always at choice. However, keep in mind that your choice not to participate as an active co-creator of your life and of the world is also a clear intention that will be answered in its own way. Better to show up and take an active role.

Fully Empowered BE-ing

The good news is, taking an active role in the creation of our lives and of the world is usually simpler than we think. Put very plainly:

There is nothing that you have to do, other than be who you are.

But just because it’s simple doesn’t mean it’s easy. Assuming your place as Master Creator of your existence requires you to claim your fully actualized, empowered state as a Divine Embodied Being. It requires that you remember fully your own Divine origins, remember that you have the right and the privilege to come to Earth to play and learn, and that you have chosen to be here in this body, for this reason.

In other words, mastering the cycles of creation isn’t really about doing anything at all. Rather, it’s about remembering who you are and letting that knowledge spread through every cell of your body and every facet of your consciousness, until your mastery of Creatorship is inevitable.

If you are ready to access your inner Master Creator, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to align with the natural cycles of Universal energy... If you are ready to show up in active participation to collaborate with Spirit in more magic than you ever thought possible... If you are ready to remember who you are and come into the full expression of your Self as a Divine Embodied Being...

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

Meditation prompt:

What would I like to create in my own life and in the world? How can I participate actively in aligning with this frequency through my BE-ing?

Righteous Living: Aligning with Flow

"Please help me to be in alignment with Divine flow, right timing and the Highest and Greatest Good."

Right timing.

I've been thinking a lot about this idea lately. In case you missed last week's article on Wu-Wei (the art of not doing), know that this has been a prevalent theme for me. I find myself asking, how can I be more in alignment with the flow of energy as it wants to move, rather than how I want it to or think it "should" move? And, in doing so, how can I align my own desires more authentically with the natural rhythms and currents of universal energy?

In addition to themes of slowing down and turning our energy inward, one of the signature energies of Autumn, according to Taoist philosophy, is righteousness. Let's look at this for a moment in contrast with self-righteousness:

Self-righteousness: my time, my reasons, my place, my people.
Righteousness: right time, right reasons, right place, right people.

Self-righteousness asserts a degree of ownership and control over the flow of energy, whereas righteousness itself infers a co-creative process of being in right relation with the flow of energy.

When you consider that distinction, what do you notice? What feelings arise in your body? I don't know about you, but when I consider the idea of right time, right reasons, right place and right people, it feels as though my whole body softens with a sigh.

What a relief.

In continuing with the theme of Wu-wei and the active process of not-doing, I am practicing paying radical attention to how self-righteousness is showing up in my life, and how I can surrender attachment and ownership and remove my sense of control from the equation. The sensation and energetic frame this requires feels much like what I find myself practicing when I work with horses.

Last week, the ranch owner asked me to demonstrate to a group of newcomers what it looks like to move a herd of horses with energy and intention. Entering an arena with five horses who are all doing their own thing, getting their attention and asking them to move cohesively as a group with focus and power is the ultimate practice in righteousness. (Oh, yeah--it was also my first time doing this exercise.) I dropped into my breath, noticed my posture shift automatically to a stance of grounded empowerment, and felt my attention move from my conscious mind ("how am I going to get them to do this?") into my subconscious, subtle awareness... the same place my attention shifts when practicing healing or psychic work.

Merely from these small changes, the horses shifted their energy and attention to me. Using the energy of their attention combined with my subtle awareness, I began to move my energy. The horses responded. As we cycled our energy and intention together, we created a feedback that resulted in the five horses running effortlessly together in a weaving pattern, with me simultaneously following their energetic flow and directing and shaping the current.

I'm not trying to be deliberately vague about this--the point is that it's not really a conscious thing. By being in a state of righteousness--reading their energy of right direction, right place, right timing and aligning myself with it--we were able to co-create flow and momentum. If I had kept my energy in my head and tried to assert my direction, my place and my timing, it probably would have fallen flat, resulted in the horses ignoring me or scattering and avoiding my direction.

Last week's very embodied experience of this simple distinction has me looking out for all areas in my life where I can practice righteousness over self-righteousness. The process feels like living constantly in that state of subtle awareness, and noticing how the universe weaves in co-creation with me when I allow it to show me the natural flow. So far, the result has been less effort-ing, less tiring, less time spent, and a whole lot more being quiet and paying attention, while making subtle shifts in response.

If you would like to join me in this ongoing practice of playing with righteousness with the universe, see below for meditation and journal prompts! Thank you for taking this journey with me into the subtle realms... 'tis the season.

This teaching comes from I AM Alchemy, and how to work with allowing energies to flow through you rather than "making" it happen.

Want to know more? Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

Many blessings,

Journal prompts:

Where in my life am I living with righteousness? Where in my life am I living with self-righteousness? What in me needs to shift in order to align with righteous living?

Meditation prompts:

What does righteousness feel like in my body? Where does it live in my body? How can I consciously access this energy and use it with intention?