As Long as it Takes

I don't usually use this platform for movie reviews, but... holy cow, y'all! I watched a documentary over the weekend that has me inspired, activated and deeply reconnected with my Inner Warrior.

When I began delving into my study of Shamanic Astrology several years ago, I learned that Aries is activated for me in a few different areas of my chart. Aries is one of these signs that we see portrayed as strong-willed and independent, but one of the ways I like to think about this archetype is through the lens of the Peaceful Warrior. Aries pushes the edges not for the sake of conflict, but because the eternal question burning inside them asks, "What is possible?" Aries is the Pioneer, the Wayshower, the one who climbs the "impossible" mountain to discover within themselves that it can be done, and to pave the way for others.

The film I watched literally portrays two such Peaceful Warriors in their quest to climb an "impossible" mountain.

The Dawn Wall (available on Netflix) follows world-class rock climbers Tommy Caldwell and Kevin Jorgeson as they attempt to successfully free climb the notorious 3,000 foot Dawn Wall of El Capitan in Yosemite. In the interest of not giving away spoilers (because I really, REALLY encourage you to watch this film), I'll share with you a couple of my takeaways without referencing specifics. If you watch it and want to email me what you got out of the film, I would love to hear from you!!!

One of the repeating themes in The Dawn Wall was the idea of "as long as it takes." This showed up not only during the actual attempt, but in the preparation. Not only had both of these people practiced climbing for pretty much their entire lives, but Tommy Caldwell had climbed El Capitan for years. When he decided to try the Dawn Wall, he spent six years researching and testing possible route sections across the sheer rock face.

When is the last time most of us spent six years devoted to mastering a very specific task where the outcome was so uncertain?

We live in a culture of instant gratification and guaranteed results... which, when you think about it, is inherently antithetical to true Mastery. The state of Mastery is an uncertain outcome with an uncertain timeline--but we do know it's a long-haul journey. As Bruce Lee famously says, "I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times." In other words, the best way to be effective and powerful in a given skill set is to simply practice it over and over, as long as it takes to master it.

Not only did Tommy and Kevin practice the Dawn Wall over and over, but they failed over and over. One thing that drives me crazy is hearing stories about someone who achieves "overnight success," when in fact, they spent years out of the spotlight developing Mastery and cultivating their skills, often failing more than they succeed until they get it right. Tommy and Kevin were in this journey for the long haul, which included years worth of injuries, setbacks, emotional toll and bloody fingers. True Mastery is a journey that tests us on every level, and offers us thousands of opportunities to walk away. Those who are committed to the journey, even with no guaranteed outcome, will show up for as long as it takes.

Back to that burning question, "What is possible?" There was no climbing route on the Dawn Wall when Tommy first considered it. This was uncharted territory in every sense of the word, that would require not only physical strength and endurance, but also creative ingenuity, emotional resilience, fierce commitment and dedication, lots of support from community, and a colossal investment of time and energy.

And yet, Aries is the keeper of the Spark--the catalyst, the tiny explosion of a match that eventually leads to a bonfire. When we ask "what is possible?", we strike a match. It's up to us whether the match goes out, or whether we nurture it into a full, blazing flame.

By nurturing that tiny spark, true Warriors push the edges of what we as a society deem "possible." All of a sudden, the seemingly impossible enters the realm of "doable," and paves the way for others to not only push their own edges but go beyond to become Wayshowers of the next frontier.

We may not all be world-class rock climbers, but I promise you that we each have an opportunity to embody our Inner Warrior in other ways. What is your Dawn Wall? Where is the question, "What is possible?" pointing you? What are you willing to show up for, to practice over and over, to fail at over and over, and to ultimately master?

Whatever your own Dawn Wall may be, know that I'm right there, climbing beside you... as long as it takes.

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a Fully Empowered Master of Transformation?

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

Inspiration



"I have a very distinct goal all the time that I'm working toward, and I love the way it makes me live."

~Tommy Caldwell

Soul on Fire

What sets your soul on fire?

As creators, we know that participating in the creative process requires a massive amount of energy to get a project, idea or brainchild off the ground. We are quite literally bringing a new entity to the world with a life force and a purpose all its own, and until that brainchild has enough energy and momentum to sustain itself, it survives by borrowing life force from its creator.

What do our creations ask of us in order to fully actualize?

I consulted the Sacred Creators Oracle. The card that came up immediately caught my attention:

"Be fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire," was one of the messages.

Have you ever read an oracle card description that feels like it's you talking to yourself? That's exactly how this felt: the words, language and messages were the same as my own ponderings and the questions I ask myself.

Right now, the creation that is asking the most of me is I AM Alchemy. This course spent about four years as an evolving and expanding set of ideas and philosophy before it was born last year as an intensive training. As we head into the second iteration of I AM Alchemy, there is definitely more momentum and infrastructure, but the creation process is not without its growing pains.

Every day as I shepherd this project into greater degrees of its unfolding, I have the opportunity to practice being fearless in pursuit of bringing to life that which sets my soul on fire... or rather, showing up even in the face of fear.

Because I AM Alchemy truly does set my soul on fire. This course epitomizes my most deeply heartfelt passion: it provides tools to empower those who are ready to step into their own fully empowered Creatorship to be masters of transformation in the world and bring their own sacred visions to life. Those of you who have joined me for the Taste of I AM Alchemy classes have witnessed my excitement and heard me exclaim how strongly I believe in the teachings and principles of practical magic.

As I participate in this process of Sacred Creatorship, I get to ask myself:

What is this creation asking of me in order to fully actualize?

Right now, I AM Alchemy is asking me to believe enough in myself to know that I can bring this work to life. It is asking me to trust that I have the skills and capacity to deliver this sacred knowledge to the world in an effective way so that it can work its magic. I AM Alchemy is asking me to trust that this work is powerful, accessible and that it makes a difference in people's lives.

Dear Creator, what are your creations asking of you at this time? How can you be fearless in the pursuit of that which sets your soul on fire?

If you want to feel confident, masterful and fully trust yourself as a practitioner...

If you are ready to cultivate a soul-aligned practice that supports your life...

If you are ready to master your intuitive gifts, your training and your craft by mastering your Self...

Apply now for I AM Alchemy.

That which sets your soul on fire is ready to be born.

Journal/meditation prompts:
 

What are my creations asking of me at this time?
How can I be fearless in the pursuit of that which sets my soul on fire?

I'm coming out!

I had a very powerful conversation with a friend of mine. This was no "ordinary" powerful conversation--I went into this conversation with my heart pounding, tears in my eyes and sincerely hoping that I wasn't about to burn a bridge with someone for whom I have a lot of love and respect.

During this conversation, we got really vulnerable. I mean we both dug deeeeep into our hearts to share some tender truths and acknowledge the impact that we've had on each other's lives and processes.

I said something to my friend that struck me as pretty important, and something that I wanted to repeat to you. I told my friend:
 

"I know that, by people being in my sphere, they are challenged and they are changed. I know that, because that's what I am here to do: I am here to help people change, regardless of how that happens."

By people being in my sphere, in my energy field, in my life, they are challenged and they are changed.

I don't think I've ever really articulated it in that way before, but it's true. When people come into my life in an energetically intimate way (as a friend, as a partner, as a client, etc), being around me challenges them and invites them to step into their own transformation.

Why am I sharing that with you?

Because you're in my sphere.

… if you are ready to be challenged, if you want to be prompted, invited and supported to transform in ways you never imagined, if you are ready to step into your own magnificent unfolding... stick around. Maybe even come a little closer.

And let me "come out" and reintroduce myself:
 

Hi, I'm Michelle Hawk.

I'm a Shamanic Alchemist who will help you
Master Your Craft by Mastering Your Self.

If you like hanging out in my energy field, thank you for being here. I'm glad to know that you're ready to be challenged.

In fact, I have a few ways that you can lean into that a little more, if you like!

By the way, that conversation with my friend went great. Yes, I was apprehensive to broach an uncomfortable topic, but I'm so glad I did. The juicy breakthroughs always come after we push our edges. My friend and I closed with a lot of gratitude and respect for each other, and deep acknowledgement of the transformative nature of our connection.

What transformation are you ready for?

Many blessings,

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a Fully Empowered Master of Transformation?

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!
>>>http://joyofenergy.com/i-am-alchemy



Journal/meditation prompts:
 

What transformation am I ready for at this time? What in my life is asking to be changed? How can I gracefully align with those changes?

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

What does it mean to Master Your Craft?

How do you know when you have?

Whether or not you're currently a practitioner (healer, bodyworker, yoga teacher, coach, naturopath, etc), we all have a craft. And I know, since you're here, that you have a vision for what is possible by mastering your craft.

One of the biggest fallacies I have seen over and over in my practice (and one that I have been guilty of, myself) is one that continues to plague the Spiritual and self-development community. And it drives me effing bonkers.

Maybe you know someone like this. Maybe you've been in this position, too! Either way, I share this with you because I believe it's one of the most fundamental components for any practitioner. The fallacy is this: many people try to master their craft without the internal process of mastering themselves.

I've shared articles with you before about the path of Self Mastery and its implications on our personal and professional lives. In fact, I designed a year-long intensive training course that helps empowered practitioners master their Craft by mastering themSelves. If you want to trust yourself as a practitioner, feel confident in your intuitive gifts and your service, build a thriving practice that supports your life and create the biggest possible impact for your clients and for the world...

Turn your energies inward.

Come home to yourself.

Master your craft by mastering your Self.
 

How do we do this, exactly? What do Masterful Practitioners have in common?

Funny you should ask! I wrote a guide for you that answers that very question:
7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft. (Don't let the name fool you--it's all about Self-Mastery.) This guide offers 7 things that all Masterful Practitioners incorporate into their practice, as well as journal and meditation prompts for you so you can incorporate them into your own practice!

Scroll down for the guide. Happy integration!

Many blessings,

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

Strong and Consistent Personal Practice

In order for them to be effective and powerful in their work, masterful practitioners know that they must cultivate health and vitality in all areas of their life: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Personal practice serves as a microcosm for the rest of our lives, and masterful practitioners prioritize their personal practice so they can successfully support their own energies as well as their clients.

Journal/meditation prompt: What do I do every day that supports my health and vitality? What specifically does this practice do for my body, my mind, my heart and my spirit? What fills me up the most?
 

Radical Self Awareness and Continual Inquiry

Masterful practitioners know themselves from the inside out, and they know that there is no “arrival.” We are never “done” our process of actualization and development—the best way to support our clients and be effective changemakers in the world is to remain in close contact with our own process so we can ensure that we’re showing up authentically, fully and clearly.

Journal/meditation prompt: Tune in with the subtleties of your body and your energy field. What do you notice? Are there any hidden, trapped emotions or beliefs that show up? How can you create space to get to “know yourself” and who you are becoming every day?
 

Self-Trust

This is different from blind faith or confidence: masterful practitioners trust themselves because they know themselves well (see previous point) and have lived experience of their own capability, capacity and resourcefulness. Even if the circumstance is new, masterful practitioners trust themselves to call upon their reservoirs of self-awareness and life experience to effectively navigate the situation.

Journal/meditation prompt: State the affirmation, “I trust myself completely.” As you do so, notice what sensations or emotions arise for you. Ask yourself, in what ways do I trust myself? In what ways do I not trust myself? How do I relate to self-trust? How do I want to embody self-trust?
 

Congruence

The way we do something is the way we do everything. Masterful practitioners embody congruence, meaning that all areas of their life and practice exhibit consistent traits and principles. A non-congruent practitioner might teach nutrition and self-care, but go home every night to binge on sugar and television. A congruent practitioner fully embodies and aligns with their practice in all areas.

Journal/meditation prompt: How am I embodying and aligning with my practice every day? In what areas am I congruent? In what areas am I incongruent? What action steps do I need to take in order to come into congruent alignment?
 

Practice is Fully Grounded and Integrated

Masterful practitioners have a seemingly effortless relationship with their practice. Their work seems to flow through and from them, as an extension of their very being. This “effortlessness” actually comes from having processed and integrated their work so deeply that every cell, every facet of consciousness and every action aligns with their practice. This energy and wisdom live fully in their body, and they draw upon it without having to think about it.

Journal/meditation prompt: How have I integrated and grounded my work? To what extent is my practice fully embodied? What remains to be integrated? What steps do I need to take to ground in my work?
 

Less Is More

Have you ever been around a practitioner who simply seems to help you feel brighter by their mere presence? The energies are subtle, words are few and precise, but incredibly effective. Masterful practitioners know that less is more: they do less and have more impact. By filling a session with doing, there is less room for being. Masterful practitioners know that true healing and growth
happens in the spaces between doing, and create plenty of room for being.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to doing? What is my relationship to being? How can I do less in order to be more effective and have more impact?
 

Healthy Relationship with Shadow

All Lightworkers must have a healthy, grounded relationship with Shadow as a sacred ally. Masterful practitioners know that “negative” emotions and energies are neither good nor bad, but merely represent one polarity of the spectrum. Instead of demonizing the Shadow, masterful practitioners welcome it as a valued teacher. They have an active working partnership with Death and the Sacred Destroyer, and know that Shadow may also work in service to love.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to Shadow? What does this say about me? How do I want to relate to Shadow? How is Shadow an ally in my life and practice?

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a fully empowered Master of Transformation?
>>>Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

The Intersection of Spirituality and Science

I AM Alchemy represents something quite phenomenal, and deeply personal. What now exists as a year-long intensive training course in practical magic began as me following my intuitive guidance to work with the natural energies of transformation. From the time I was very young, this way of looking at the world has simply made the most sense to me. When I first began officially studying and practicing Shamanism in 2003, my natural inclinations were confirmed by an Earth-based way of knowing that is older than recorded history itself.

I was always interested in healing, science, magic, personal inquiry and the miracle of nature, and I discovered while I was in high school that these concepts had a very natural intersection. I continued my education and investigation. While earning my undergraduate degree in Animal Physiology and Behavior, I simultaneously completed my Reiki Master training and furthered my Shamanic studies. I walked the paths of magic and of science at the same time, and discovered that they ultimately led to the same place: back to that same world view that I’d had as a child, but with all the benefits of the added wisdom of life experience.

I AM Alchemy is simply a synthesis of this world view. That which I took for granted as a child (the sacredness of life itself, the magic that exists in all beings, the power and utter majesty of the Earth) now takes on new significance through the lens of where the path has taken me through the study of life. As I grew beyond my young innocence, I learned that not everyone experiences the world in this way… but that people are hungry for it again, and the time has come for us to reclaim this Sacred Work.

This course is a revolution not only in of the body of knowledge itself, but also in the way that we relate to knowledge. Science and Spiritual practice have more in common than we might think: both are means of discovering Truth, both emphasize inquiry and research, both honor the contributions of our ancestors (physical, energetic and intellectual) and both, in their purest form, serve to uplift, empower and inspire all beings.

These two paths of Science and Spirituality were once a unified journey. The investigation of Life took place just as much within the heart as within the lab. Modern chemistry, medicine and principles of physics were born from the research of Spiritual practitioners as they sought to identify God in the world around them. Throughout history, Alchemists are noted not only for their philosophical and Spiritual work, but their contributions to the scientific community. Alchemy is one of the few (if not the only) practices that has maintained a foot in both worlds.

However, these paths drifted apart, and the worlds of Science and Spirit grew to vilify each other. History is riddled with examples of the scientific community looking upon Spiritual practitioners with disdain, and just as many examples of the Spiritual community rejecting the findings of Science. The path of Science shifted in the Yang direction of logic, linear thinking, reason and structure, and Spiritual practice as a whole moved in the Yin direction of fluidity, passivity and suppression in the outer world. The Spiritual collective had lost its structure, and Science had lost its soul.

We are at a turning point in the evolution of the planet where we have the opportunity to bring these fields once more into collaboration and support of each other. I firmly believe, having walked both paths, that this is one of the fundamental pieces necessary in order for us to live a life of fully empowered creatorship. In order to truly actualize the world of our hearts and dreams, our relationship to knowing must include both the evidence-based experience, and the power of faith.

The time for knowledge that exists only in the thinking, rational state is over. Now is the time of feeling, embodied wisdom and subtle perception.

The time for retreating into an oblivious bliss state and separating from the physical realm is over. Now is the time of sovereignty, discernment and returning magic to the workings of Earth.

I AM Alchemy operates as a training in practical magic through the paths of both Science and Spirituality. Throughout this course, we’ll be using the principles of scientific inquiry: asking really good questions, tracking data (lots of journaling and opportunities to reflect on trends), moving along a trajectory of investigation and grounding our results into our lived experience. We’ll also be working with principles of Spiritual practice: honoring the immediacy and multifaceted nature of Truth, taking time for reverence and pure connection, inviting Spirit into our lives and living in alignment with the sacredness all around us.

My greatest wish for this work is that it serves to help usher in a new way of being on this planet—one that honors the sacredness of life and also gives us a road map for how to live in this world.

May this work support your own journey of sacred unfolding as you come home to yourself.

May this work support the freedom, sovereignty and health of all beings on Earth.

We do this work for the benefit of ourselves, of all those around us, of all beings on Earth and of the Earth Herself.
 

Ready to apply for the course?

Apply here>>http://joyofenergy.com/i-am-alchemy

Cycles of Power: Winter

Cycles of Power

Many people view time and energy as a linear trajectory: we experience a series of sequential events and threads that make up our lives. In reality, time and energy function much less like a line and more like a spiral. Energy naturally fluctuates, and as the saying goes, what goes up must come down (and go up again, and so on), following the Universal Law of expansion and contraction.

By bringing awareness to the cyclical nature of energetic movement and our own cycles of power, we learn to align our own personal energies in the most effective and efficient way with cycles of power that exist outside of us. Think about it like a current: it is much easier to swim with the current than against it. Swimming against the current is inefficient, tiring and you have little to show for your exertion. Working with Cycles of Power is like learning to swim with the current at all times—less work for you, greater results and you get to enjoy the ride.

In this case, we’re working with the Cycles of Power that we witness in the change of seasons. Shamanic tradition teaches us that each season has its own suite of associated energies. These seasonal signatures offer us clues as to how we can align our own energies to effectively “swim with the current.” Let's take a look at what Winter energy holds:
 

Seasonal Signatures of Winter

• Energy: Yin

• Direction: North

• Signatures: Silence, stillness, rest, hibernation, integration

• Guides: Animals of “structure” (such as Bear and Elk) and strong Tribe (such as Wolf)

Autumn asked us to harvest the seeds we planted and begin the journey inward, and Winter asks us to fully arrive home within ourselves to rest and replenish our energies. Consider the fields in Winter: the crops have been harvested, the soil turned under and left to rest until Spring. This is the season to offer that to ourselves so that we can fully integrate the energies of the year and be ready for the next Spring. Here are some ways you can orient yourself to Winter magic:

Aligning to the Cycle of Power of Winter

• Sleep more than you would any other time of year--how much does your body actually want to sleep? How can you include more rest in your day?

• If you default to listening to music in the background, try turning it off and tuning in to the silence.

• Even if you have an active personal practice (exercise, moving meditation, etc) add in a few moments of stillness. Maybe include an extended Shavasana in your yoga practice, or shift your movement practice in a more Yin direction. Restorative yoga, Yin forms of Qi Gong, stretching and rolling out your body are great for this season.

• Take a moment to review your year. Winter is the time of integration--what needs to be processed from 2018? (Stay tuned for a special Solstice article from me for more tools on this!)

• The guides of Winter orient our energies to hibernation, structure and Tribe. Consider hosting or attending intimate gatherings to share stories and build connection.

I invite you to take some time before the Solstice on Saturday to sit with your intentions for Winter. See below for some helpful journal prompts!

Applications for I AM Alchemy are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Many blessings,

Journal Prompts:

• What do I notice as I turn my energy fully inward? How does it feel to fully "arrive" in myself?

• What is my relationship to stillness? Where is my life asking for more stillness? What does that look like?

• What in my life needs rest? What needs to be restored or repaired?

• How am I engaging with my Tribe? How would I like to engage with my Tribe?

I invite you to journal for 3-5 minutes on each prompt, and allow yourself to slow down and tune in. Take some space on Friday to honor this process and allow yourself to fully arrive in your own Winter!

What is the core purpose of your calling?

What is the core purpose of our calling?

For all of us Soul Aligned humans out there, living "on purpose" is a significant component of our awareness. Whether you're a professional Lightworker Soulpreneur, or a Lightworker spreading love through your life path, awareness of our Sacred Purpose is a compass point we all attune to in order to stay true to our inner North.

...and yet, what is the greater purpose that we serve by following our calling? Does that get lost in the shuffle? If we're tuning in to the compass point of our calling, what is the ultimate "destination?"

Last week I had a conversation with a woman who wanted to put on a workshop around compassionate communication. After listening to her ideas and thoughts, I reflected back to her that I didn't hear a very clear idea of the purpose behind her workshop. She replied with confusion that she would have thought the purpose was obvious: we're all human and it's a good thing to communicate with compassion.

As we discussed further, it became apparent that while she felt the calling of offering her Compassionate Communication workshop, she was not clearly connected to the core purpose that this workshop would serve in the greater context... of her work, and of her own Sacred Purpose. I lead her through an exercise called "For what purpose?" so that she could have a clearer view of not only this individual workshop, but of her work as a puzzle piece within the larger whole.

Lightworker, what is the core purpose of your calling? How do you connect not only with the immediate steps in front of you, but with how this calling serves a purpose beyond you? What is your personal contribution as a piece in the cosmic puzzle?

Having access to this awareness provides us not only with the calling immediately in front of us, but with some context around the ultimate, core purpose of why we are orienting ourselves to this particular North.

Would you like to know exactly where your inner compass is leading you? If you would like to practice the "For what purpose?" exercise, here is the formula and an example:

Our "For what purpose?" formula goes as follows:

1. Statement A.

2. Statement A, for what purpose?

3. Statement A, so that Statement B.

4. Statement B, for what purpose?

5. Statement B, so that Statement C.

6. Statement C, for what purpose?

7. Statement C, so that Statement D... until you reach the point where there is no higher purpose.

You get the idea. Let me give you an example:

1. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy: Master Alchemist Training.

2. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy, for what purpose?

3. My path is calling me to offer I AM Alchemy so that my students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts.

4. So that my students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts, for what purpose?

5. My students may fully remember and reclaim who they are and trust their innate gifts, so that they can come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship.

6. So that my students can come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship, for what purpose?

7. My students may come into their full Self Mastery and Creatorship, so that they are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth.

8. So that my students are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth, for what purpose?

9. My students are empowered to participate in the creation of a New Earth, so that all beings on Earth and the Earth herself may be aligned to the frequency of love.

Your turn to try it!

...and I would love to hear from you! If you feel called, please comment once you have completed the exercise and let me know what you discovered in that exercise!

From one Lightworker living "on purpose" to another, keep it up!

Applications for I AM Alchemy are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Many blessings,

What is the filter of the guidance you're receiving?

Self Mastery

Original Medicine: the purest, most authentic expression of one's core essence (the I AM).

Original Medicine: the actualization and translation of the core essence into one's lived experience.

It's amazing how the core essence of who we are and what we're doing in the world can be right in front of our faces, and yet it sometimes takes years of practice, learning, falling down and peeling back the layers to see it properly and remember who we are.

Sound familiar?

As a child, I lived my Medicine effortlessly. I spoke fluently with animals and nature, I saw energies and played with the life force all around me. I intuitively worked with crystals and offered healing energy, all before the time I was 12 years old.

My Original Medicine came from sheer Grace, innocence and an uninhibited dance with Spirit.

I never fully stepped away from my sense of Self, but as I grew older, I started to realize that not everyone experienced magic the way I did. Thus began my journey of hiding my heart, of playing it cool and trying to fit in.

When I began studying and practicing Shamanism at age 15, I only told my immediate family.

When I began my Reiki training while earning a degree in biology at University, I pretended not to care when my classmates scoffed at my suggestions that perhaps energy healing might have a role to play in modern medicine.

When I traveled and lived abroad, I was careful not to let anyone observe me praying and living my magic, because I was already an outsider.

Throughout all that time, even though it took place under the surface, I learned to consciously understand and work with my Medicine. I received initiations, I listened to guidance from mentors, I practiced my intuition, I honed my abilities and brought the understanding of my Medicine into my mind.

I had become a student of my Medicine, but I still hadn't claimed it fully.

I started publicly practicing and offering my work to the world. I flexed my healer muscles and began to implement what I had learned.

Suddenly, I was thrust into a Dark Night of the Soul initiation cycle. I entered one of the most traumatic periods in my life, when it felt like I might lose everything: my family, my community, my health, my trust, my life and my connection with Spirit.

In this Dark Night of the Soul, it was my Original Medicine that saved me.

Even though I had fallen so far that I had almost forgotten who I was, I still experienced flickers of magic that helped me remember just enough. The call and power of my Medicine gave me the strength to claw myself out of a dangerous situation, and begin the arduous journey of healing my wounds of forgetting.

For that period, I had stepped away from who I was. I had abandoned my true nature, my innate wisdom and I had placed myself in harm's way.

As soon as I remembered who I was, the power of my Medicine came flooding back.

Over the past several years, I have grown from an Adept in my Original Medicine to a Master of Self.

I have brought my work back into Spirit, returned to a state of ease and once again felt that effortless embodiment of magic.

As I reclaim my own Self Mastery, I once again feel the Grace and effortlessness that I had experienced in my Original Medicine as a child.

But this time, that Grace comes from a full-circle investigation of my Original Medicine.

It comes from consciously recognizing and choosing every day to walk my path.

It comes from Self Mastery.

It comes from who I AM.

...just as YOUR own Self Mastery comes from your I AM.

As I consciously claim my Self Mastery and connect ever more deeply with who I AM…

...I AM witnessing people find the courage to remember who they are and not shrink from the greatness of their purpose.

...I AM guiding Lightworkers to fully understand and trust their innate wisdom, and feel empowered to know that who they are and what they are is enough.

...I AM supporting fellow empaths, intuitives, healers and practitioners as they rediscover their Original Medicine and their most authentic service.

...I AM watching people claim their role as the magical creators of their lives.

...I AM witnessing leaders and changemakers step up with conviction to usher in a new Earth.

I AM...

A SHAMAN

I walk in both worlds of Earth and Spirit, and hold the wisdom of the ancestors. I guide you to attune to the power of your own lineage.

A LIGHTWORKER

I AM here to resonate the frequency of a New Earth by embodying and shining my Heart Light, and helping you find this light within yourself.

AN ALCHEMIST

I know and align with the cycles of transformation, and teach you this process so that you may Alchemize yourself into the true gold of an awakened soul.

A CHANGEMAKER

I AM a master of the cycles of creation and destruction, of Shamanic Death and Rebirth. I support you through these rites of passage as you come into the fullest expression of who you are.

A CREATOR

I have orchestrated the birth of many worlds, and I AM here to hold you in your power as Magical Creator of your own.

A MENTOR

I embody the lessons of this and all my lifetimes so that I may shepherd you through your own teachings and initiations.

A HUMAN

I AM here to love Earth and all her children. I AM here to help us rediscover Spirit in every cell of a living planet. I AM here to witness and honor you as you walk your own, sacred path of becoming.

What This Means for You

You might be thinking at this point: "Okay, now I know more about Michelle and where she's coming from. But how does that impact me?"

My journey of Self Mastery impacts you because:

• I believe that you already have everything you need, and that deep down, you already know who you are. There is nothing I can give you that you do not already have access to, but I can help you find the way.

• The world needs you to live your Sacred Purpose. I know that part of mine is to help you remember and live yours.

• Part of your path is to fully understand, trust and live your innate wisdom. I've been there, and I have some amazing tools to help you.

• You are invited to bring ALL of your Self to our work together. Every single part of you is welcome in our conversations, because it's all a part of your journey. Even the crunchy, shadowy bits. (Especially those.)

• There is no such thing as singular Truth. What is true for me may not be true for you, and there is enough room for that in our container for that to be the case.

I hope that gave you a little bit of insight into where I'm coming from when I offer guidance, inspiration and perspective! I highly encourage you to take a moment to consider the filter of your source whenever you find yourself seeking guidance... whether it's from a loved one, from a mentor, from the internet or from Spirit. Please know that the filter is just as important as the guidance itself.

For my part, it is an honor to be a part of your journey. Thank you for choosing to include me on your path of Self Mastery. I hope you receive what you're looking for, and maybe even something you didn't know you needed.

If you would like some guidance regarding your own journey of Self Mastery, please see below for some journal and meditation prompts!

Applications for I AM Alchemy 2020 are now open. Calling all Lightworkers! Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of Self Mastery... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you.

Many blessings,

Meditation Prompt (use as mantra or sit with this idea and see what comes up):

"I know who I AM.
I know what I AM.
I know how I serve."

Journal Prompt:

"What does my I AM Presence want me to know about mySelf? How does my I AM presence want to be expressed in the world?

Freedom Through Commitment

What are your commitments?

What a beautiful weekend! My students and I just finished three days of deep-dive magic and practice at our third I AM Alchemy retreat.

...and I feel so much clarity.

This course is one of the most aligned, authentic components of my business to date. Within the framework of I AM Alchemy, there are teachings, structures and syllabus. But one of the things I love most about teaching a body of knowledge based in practical, real-time magic is the freedom.

Read on for one of the highlight takeaways from the weekend! You can apply this tool to uplevel and receive clarity in your own practice!

General applications for I AM Alchemy 2019 are now open. Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of commitment to Self, Spirit and your practice... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you. Apply here: I AM Alchemy

I admit that part of me was a tad apprehensive last year at the idea of offering a year-long course, especially at the idea of being tied to a syllabus. One of the things I value most in my business is the flexibility I have to offer what feels most lit-up, and sometimes that can change from year to year, or season to season.

But the thing about this course is, it is a life force of its own, and as such, it has a process of evolution and growth within the body of knowledge itself. I AM Alchemy is not a dry, scripted teaching from a dusty book. It is a vital, living entity that has its own energy flow and plan. Someone asked me recently how I organize and offer my teachings, and the most honest response was simply, "I listen to what wants to be shared."

This is the difference between teaching and stewardship. Yes, I have a plan. Yes, I have a course outline and documents and structure. But more important than this is the capacity to listen and to transmit what wants to come through, and knowing that it will be exactly the right thing for my students.

Ultimately, my role in this process is to simply pass along the messages. As a steward of this mystery school, part of my job is to be quiet and allow myself to be guided, so that I can guide my students in turn. This is my commitment to Spirit and to Alchemy itself, and as long as I practice this work, I honor this commitment. As long as I honor this commitment, I have the freedom I desire in my practice.

My commitments to this body of knowledge allow me to be an active participant in the mystery, which always feels like the most lit-up path.

In preparation for the retreat, I asked my students to write their own commitments. This practice is our way of making a contract of sorts with ourselves and with the work. We witnessed each other in our commitments during ceremony, and the power that came from this practice blew myself and everyone away.

What happens when we make these commitments? What happens when we spell out in writing what we are signing up for as a Lightworker on this planet?

What are your commitments?

Here some of are mine. Check out below for the prompts I offered my students if you would like to write your own.

As an Alchemist, I commit...

As an Alchemist, I commit to holding myself in trust and compassion through change as I discover and know fully all parts of my Self. I commit to bringing magic to every facet of my life.

As an Alchemist, I commit to bringing more subtlety, intentionality, precision and grace to my work. I commit to redefining my personal practice to align more supportively and harmoniously with my well-being.

As an Alchemist, I commit to carrying out the operations of the Sun, Moon and Earth here on this planet for the Highest and Greatest Good of all beings.

As an Alchemist, I commit to being an instrument and steward of this body of knowledge, to ensuring its path in the modern world, and to honoring and participating in this cycle, always. I commit to holding the torch so that those who are ready may find the path. I commit to listening always to this work, and offering teachings in alignment with the instruction I receive.

If you are ready to step into your own commitments to the path, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to answer your deep soul calling to live your purpose... If you are ready to step into fulfillment of your Soul Contract and commitments... If you are ready to remember who you truly are, claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Applications are now open! Apply here: I AM Alchemy

Many blessings,

Journal prompt:

What are my commitments to my Self?
What are my commitments to my practice?
What are my commitments to Spirit?
What do I need in order to honor those commitments?

Self Mastery: The Alchemist's Path

Dear Tribe,

Thank you for continuing to ask the Big Questions. You know the ones I mean...

"Who am I?"
"What is my purpose?"
"What the f*** am I doing with my life?"

If you're asking these questions, you're in the right place.

I enjoyed two deep-dive days last weekend with a mentor of mine looking at some of these Big Questions, but honestly, my biggest takeaway wasn't an answer, and it wasn't even a question in itself:

My biggest takeaway was learning WHY I was asking Big Questions.

One of the teachings we visited over the weekend was the 6 Core Drivers of Human Behavior (originally from Tony Robbins). I was already familiar with these drivers, but something landed for me in a new way when I looked at my primary driver: Significance.

"People who are driven by Significance are those who crave Mastery of their lives," my mentor said.

I had always taken for granted my interest in self-inquiry and Self Mastery, but never before put the idea together with an archetypal driver of my behavior that impacts my choices, my world view and how I offer my work in the world.

You see, this weekend I learned that not only do I want to know myself and practice the path of Self Mastery, but:

I want it to matter.

I want my journey to be important and serve other people.

I want the questions I ask myself and the path of self-knowledge to ripple out farther beyond me than I could ever imagine.

I want the path of Self Mastery to be available to all who seek it.

If you are seeking this path of Self Mastery, read on.

"What you seek is seeking you." ~Rumi

I AM: The One Presence, the God Body, Christ Consciousness; the identification, resonance and expression of the Divine Self.

"Know thyself."

You're probably familiar with this idea.

This particular maxim has appeared in many philosophical and literary works throughout the ages. Its roots go back to ancient Greece and the Temple of Apollo at Delphi, although some historians cite origins even earlier in the temples of ancient Egypt. More recently than Socrates and Plato, however, we've seen this aphorism show up in the works of Benjamin Franklin, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Carl Jung and even in The Matrix film series.

The theme of self-knowledge, and therefore, Self Mastery, has been one of the governing quests of humanity, if not the ultimate investigative journey. Who has not wondered about their identity, their sense of Self, and their place in the world? In fact, I can guarantee that, if you are reading this email, you have asked yourself in some form, "Who am I?"

I've been there, too. In fact, I'm there right now.

When I was playing with some ideas last year about the course that has since become I AM Alchemy, I found myself asking a lot of Big Questions, among them:

"What is actually the point of this course? What is the goal?"

"What do I want my students to learn or achieve as a result of this course?"

"...what the heck do I call it???" (Okay, maybe this isn't exactly a "Big Question.")

I meditated on these questions as I considered not only Alchemical philosophy and its role in the modern world, but also my personal values and desires as a facilitator of this body of knowledge. After all, we are not separate from the work we offer, and I knew that any teachings (especially transmissions from such a powerful mystery school) would be coming through the filter of my own sense of Self.

The school of Alchemy is primarily known in popular understanding as the process of turning lead into gold, but most people don't realize that gold is not actually the Alchemist's goal. In addition to producing gold, the end result of a successful Alchemical process is the Philosopher's Stone, or Ultima Materia: the perfected, fully actualized state that symbolizes the union between Above and Below, or the Heavenly and Earthly Selves. In the case of the Alchemist, the Philosopher's Stone is the fully actualized Self: the embodied state of our Divine nature... the I AM.

In other words, Self Mastery is the path of the Alchemist.

I knew when I was developing the course last year, and I was reminded over the weekend as I sat with my driver of Significance: I want my journey to serve others, and I want the path of Self Mastery to be available to all those Lightworkers who seek it.

This was my intention in creating this course, and this is my greatest desire for my students: that they remember who they are as fully actualized, Divine Embodied Beings, and that they identify, resonate and express their own I AM Presence for themselves and for the world.

When I said that I'm right there on the path with you, I meant it. I know that by offering this course in I AM Alchemy, by inviting my students to ask Big Questions, by encouraging them to explore and examine every facet of their lives through the lens of Self Mastery and transformation, by leading them through the fires of change and asking them to trust that they will make it out the other side...

I am asking myself some Big Questions.

I am examining every facet of my life through the lens of Self Mastery and not taking anything for granted.

I am walking voluntarily through the fires of change and watching those parts of my life that were no longer aligned burn to the ground.

I am having to trust my Self and my path more than ever before, even when it's hard. Even when it means stepping away from things I love. Even when the outcome isn't guaranteed, but I know that if I didn't try I would regret it for the rest of my life.

...because, on the other side of that, is my I AM.

This is what I want for my Self.

This is what I want for my students.

This is what I want for you, if you choose it.

If you are ready to step into your own path of Self Mastery, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to have clear access to your fully actualized Self... If you are ready to come into the fullest expression of your Divine Nature... If you are ready to claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

"What you seek is seeking you." ~Rumi

Journal prompt:

What am I seeking?
What is seeking me?

Alchemist: You Are a Visionary Thought Leader

Visionary: A person who has a vision for their world.

Thought Leader: A person who can effectively communicate their vision to others, inspiring them to think differently and planting seeds of change.

Raise your hand if you have a vision, a dream or an idea for what you would like to see in the world.

I thought so.

If you're like me, you have lots of ideas that relate somehow to this grand vision of a better world that lives in your heart. You hold this vision, you're connected to the feeling it gives you and when you think about it, something lights up inside you... something that gives you a little fire in your belly and an urge to move forward into making it a reality.

Alchemy is known as the process of transformation, yet before the Alchemist can begin the journey, they must have a vision for the desired outcome. I can guarantee you that no Alchemist started practicing because they were perfectly content with themselves and the world as it is. One of the principles of Alchemy is rectification: the act of putting something right (or in the case of Alchemy, the process of transmuting something into its highest potential form and elevating its state of being). The path of the Alchemist is one of trusting one's Sacred Vision and in coaxing this form into being through the magic of transformation.

Alchemists as Visionaries

A visionary may or may not know exactly where they're going or what the final result will be like, but they usually have a pretty good idea. An Alchemist knows that the end product of a successful Alchemical operation will be the Philosopher's Stone: an elevated, perfected state of matter and consciousness that will inspire and elevate all that comes into contact with it... But the nature of the Stone is unique to the Alchemist, and thus, a mystery until it manifests.

Alchemy, then, is a practice in holding faith in this Sacred Vision, even if we're not exactly sure what it looks like. Maybe your Sacred Vision is an elevated state of improved health and well-being, maybe it's moving into a different career or supporting your family, maybe it's living internationally. Whatever your Sacred Vision, the more connected you are to knowing and feeling it with every part of your being, the more easily it comes about. And just as with the Philosopher's Stone, the final manifestation of your Vision will be unique to you.

Alchemists as Thought Leaders

This was the idea that interested me most. I modified our working definition from what was given in the workshop, and it feels important to explore it further. Let's break it down:

1. A person who can effectively communicate their vision to others.
I want to emphasize here that "effectively communicate" does not necessarily mean "talk about." Rather, I invite you to consider all other means of communication. What if a vision could be communicated through someone's way of being? What if, rather than talking about the virtues of compassion and the vision of a compassionate world, a Thought Leader simply behaved compassionately? By modeling the behavior and way of being, a Thought Leader can effectively invite others to join them in actualizing the vision.

Alchemy is one of the most secretive, mysterious and deliberately concealed bodies of knowledge. Historically, Alchemists wanted to protect this mystery school from those who would misuse or take advantage of the power available through Alchemy, and protect themselves in the process. Therefore, Alchemical wisdom has traditionally been communicated entirely in metaphor, imagery, indirect teaching and through modeling the practice. While none of this teaching was direct transmission, it was nonetheless effective. Alchemical instruction only very recently shifted to include written works and more straightforward communication.

2. A person who inspires others to think differently.
Consciousness is the root of all creation, and thoughts are the manifestation of our consciousness. If you're familiar with the Law of Attraction, you know that "that which we think about comes about." Let's reverse this: if you take a look at your life, you will have a very good idea of what your thoughts have been leading up to this point. If you don't like what you see when you look around at your world, start by changing your thoughts.

An Alchemist knows that their greatest tool is their own consciousness, and their most effective means of change is to shift the consciousness of not only themselves but of all beings. An Alchemist as a Thought Leader will invite others to create a shift in their thinking that is aligned with a shared Sacred Vision, thus harnessing the collective consciousness to move more easily in a common direction.

3. A person who plants the seeds of change.
We live in an ever-changing world, and the Alchemist is the first to acknowledge and ally themselves with the cycles of transformation. After all, once the Alchemical process is complete, we start again at the beginning. Alchemists plant seeds for change, knowing that even the massive oak tree comes from a tiny acorn. All great changes and worldwide paradigm shifts begin with a seed, just as a bonfire begins with a spark.

When I consider the greater implications of my own Alchemy work and the I AM Alchemy course, the possibilities of this particular Sacred Vision become even more magical. I know the power that comes from being the guardian of a Sacred Vision, and the responsibility that comes from actualizing this vision in the world. Yet, that responsibility is a gift to be honored and enjoyed. As a Visionary Thought Leader, the Alchemist walks the sacred path of seeing to the heart of something and beholding its highest potential, and the most cherished honor of communicating this vision to others, inspiring people to align with this different consciousness and planting the seeds of change for this vision to be born.

Together, we Visionary Thought Leader Alchemists are creating worlds.

If you are ready to access your inner Visionary Thought Leader, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to have clear access to the amazing vision you hold for the world... If you are ready to communicate this vision to others through the power of your being... If you are ready to plant the seeds of magic and change in the hearts of those around you... If you are ready for your magical vision to be born into the world...

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

Journal prompt:

What is the Sacred Vision I have for the world?
How can I communicate this vision effectively?
How am I living in alignment with this vision and inviting others to join me in this world?

Wu-wei: the Art of "Not Doing"

This week, I am taking space for... "not doing."

One of the recent practices I've been playing with is the Taoist philosophy of wu-wei, which translates to "not doing," "not forcing," or "not striving."

This idea reminds me of something I heard from my Reiki master during a class many years ago: she said that Western society tells us, "Don't just sit there, do something!" Meanwhile, Reiki philosophy tells us, "Don't just do something, sit there!" We are taught to value action--even action undirected, merely for the sake of doing something--over taking a moment to sit and be present, without trying to exert or enforce ourselves on a situation.

The concept of wu-wei is not about being passive or sitting around. In fact, it is a very active principle. However, rather than channeling energy in the direction of what "should" or "shouldn't" be happening, the person practicing the art of wu-wei is simply noticing what is happening in present time, without trying to assert or impose their will upon the situation. Instead, this radical presence creates space to notice where energy is naturally flowing. If we accept that all things naturally move toward harmony and we ourselves are aligned with the vibration of harmony, following the natural current of energy in a situation will eventually lead to a harmonious outcome. Wu-wei demands that we release any attachment to the outcome of a situation while simultaneously being present in a state of heart-centered allowing.

Are you still with me?

I did a lot of "doing," "pushing" and "striving" this summer. On one hand, I got a lot done and learned massive lessons about sustainability, allocation of energy and how I want my life and my business to run. On the other hand, I worked myself into a state of depletion and overwhelm. Admittedly, elements of this were out of my hands. However, I ultimately had the biggest part to play in taking on more than was strictly healthy for my schedule and energy capacity.

Enter wu-wei.

In assessing where I can make improvements to ensure that I don't make the same mistake again, one of my solutions involved blocking off at least one week out of every month through January of next year where I do not take clients. These allocated weeks in my schedule will be a combination of deep rest (actual days off in addition to my normal days off, time to rest and recharge), deep work (dedicated days of working in my business as opposed to on my business) and deep listening. This last one is the most important.

During these times of deep listening, I am committed to quieting the outside noise, turning off my phone and being radically present in noticing the natural currents of energy in my body, my heart and my life. Knowing that I am aligned with harmony and that all energies naturally move in that direction, when I create space for noticing, I may follow my natural flow into harmony.

When I am "not doing," I may practice radical attention. When I am "not forcing," I may be in deep allowing. When I am "not striving," I may dance and flow with the natural currents of health, vitality and joy.

This is one of those weeks! I am delighted to see what will come out of these days of deep rest, deep work and deep listening. I promise to keep you posted on this little experiment of mine, and of course, you are invited to join me if you like!

Also this teaching comes from I AM Alchemy, and how to work with allowing energies to flow through you rather than "making" it happen.

Want to know more? Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020

Many blessings,

Journal prompt:

Where in my life am I taking action simply for the sake of acting? Where am I "doing," "forcing" and "striving?" How is that serving me? How is it not serving me?

Where in my life can I practice wu-wei?
How can that serve me?

Peek Behind the Veil: What happens at I AM Medicine Mentorship?

Happy Equinox! On Sunday, I got to spend the day with a handful of my amazing spiritual mentorship clients. After a wonderful day at my favorite retreat center, I feel...

...full of energy, enjoyment, grace, and amazing food.

...inspired by my amazing clients, by my personal takeaways, and by the practice itself.

...honored to bring together a group of such powerful, aligned women who are all walking the path.

...supported by the epic land and its steward, Ruthanne of Heaven and Earth Retreats.

...eager to share the magic with you!

Here's a sneak peek inside what goes on during a magical I AM Medicine mentorship day:

We started off the morning with building community: we gathered around a fire to eat delicious snacks while creating connection, sharing our journeys and discovering how much we have in common! How many of us go through our lives feeling like we're alone and have no community, only to come together in a group like this and discover that there are other amazing people out there having the same experience?

We talked about the energies of Autumn, the equinox and meditated to receive a guide for our journey through the West Gate.

After a delicious, gourmet lunch, and some gentle Qi Gong (didn't get a photo because it's hard to demonstrate movement and take pictures at the same time), we headed back out to sit around the fire again. We all wrote intentions for what we would like to "consciously compost." Part of working with Autumn is about what are you choosing NOT to harvest, but instead, to put back into the Earth to turn under and replenish the soil? We then "composted" these energies in a fire ceremony.

Following the fire ceremony, we built a collective altar with what we are harvesting and want to create more of in our lives.

What an epic healing circle! We meditated, prayed and all settled in to enjoy a deep, nourishing healing experience. Everyone was blown away by the power of the group!

We took away some steps for guidance on our Creator path. Everyone's message aligned perfectly with their intention!

We closed as the evening sun was filtering through the trees and bathing everything in nourishing, golden light. As we enjoyed a round of epic snacks to help us ground back in our bodies, we reflected on the powerful experiences, aha! moments and takeaways of the group. One last group hug circle and we drove off into the sunset!

I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful, nourishing, inspiring retreat day experience! This work is so much FUN, and I get to share it with a cohort of passionate, powerful clients who are changing their lives and changing the world. It is truly an honor and a joy to dive deeper and deeper into this work. I AM Medicine is stretching me, pushing me and inspiring me to uplevel my practice and my craft in ways I never imagined. What a journey.

Would you be interested in joining my I AM Alchemy spiritual mentorship? Sign up here!

I'll be taking the next few days to rest and integrate! Catch you soon.

Many blessings,

Michelle Hawk

P.S. Enjoy this Journal prompt:

How am I receiving now from the intentions I set earlier in the spring?
What am I harvesting this Autumn?
What would I like to turn under to be composted?

Peek Behind the Veil: What happens at I AM Alchemy Retreat?

I just got back from our second four day retreat with my I AM Alchemy 2018 students, and I feel...

...full of energy, enjoyment, grace, and amazing food.

...inspired by my amazing students, by my personal takeaways, and by the body of knowledge itself.

...supported by my wonderful Shaman Sister, Katherine Bird, and by Ruthanne and Heaven and Earth Retreats.

...eager to share the magic with you!

Here's a sneak peek inside what goes on during a magical I AM Alchemy retreat:

Every morning, we began our day with Qi Gong practice lead by guest instructor Katherine Bird. Kat brought us practices from her Medical Qi Gong studies to support the energetic work. During this retreat, part of our focus included working with the Three Essentials (Salt, Mercury and Sulfur) and our personal Planetary Constitution. Here, Kat introduces us to the philosophy behind our movement practice:

We learned how to calculate the personal planetary constitution of everyone in the class, based on the Alchemical doctrine of Planetary Rulership. This includes primary archetypal influences, personal "power hours," and supporting the energies with corresponding metals, herbs, colors, foods and embodiment practices...

...Then we studied  the necessary correspondences to support our personal Salt, Mercury and Sulfur Level Planetary Forces. I'm a double Moon plus Mars, which explains a lot.

We played games and found out who among us is competitive (hint: 2/3 of Team Mars, big surprise). We ate incredible food, we did intuitive readings and healing work for each other, we took a stargazing stroll and saw Jupiter, Saturn, Venus and Mars. We laughed a lot and witnessed each other through our joy and our tears. We examined our personal and professional practices in light of this mystery school and renewed our commitments to Self and Spirit as wayshowers for a New Earth.

We all took an afternoon of solo ritual space to Vision Quest and practice journey work to step into this next initiation phase of our course. Everyone worked some pretty powerful magic and came back with epiphanies, commitments, messages from Guides and new, powerful energies to supercharge the next stage of the journey.

The weekend included plenty of time for journaling and personal reflection. In such a beautiful setting, you can't help but breathe a little deeper, tune in to a more subtle awareness and just let yourself simply be.

There were signs and synchronicities everywhere! We received plenty of visits from animal guides, whispers from Spirit, and massive inputs of eclipse energy. Every sign felt like a message from Source, saying "you're on the right track. Enjoy the journey."

Plus, we got to wake up with this right outside every morning. Check out the view from my bed:

I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful, nourishing, inspiring retreat experience! This work is so much FUN, and I get to share it with a cohort of passionate, powerful students who are changing their lives and changing the world. It is truly an honor and a joy to dive deeper and deeper into this work. I AM Alchemy is stretching me, pushing me and inspiring me to uplevel my practice and my craft in ways I never imagined. What a journey.

If you're interested in I AM Alchemy 2019, get on the wait list here!

I'll be taking the next few days to rest and integrate! Catch you in August.

Full Blood Moon Eclipse Magic

Full Blood Moon Eclipse: Friday, July 27 at 1:22pm PST.

This weekend, we get to enjoy the second of three back-to-back-to-back eclipses, which also happens to be the longest eclipse of the century. For those of us in the PNW, we won't get to appreciate witnessing the eclipse visually, but we can still take some time to bask in the energies and set intentions.

This full moon lunar eclipse takes place in the sign of Aquarius: the revolutionary keeper of the Sacred Vision. As part of our I AM Alchemy retreat, we'll be holding a vision quest ritual for the eclipse. Here are some of the themes we're working with as a class:

• Moving into the Separation stage of Alchemy: stepping back to gain perspective, and separating out the pieces of our sacred inquiry in order to understand and evaluate them all.
• Moving out of the Black Phase (sacred destruction) and into the White Phase of Alchemy (reorganization/reconstruction).
• Working with Eclipse magic: playing with energetic polarity and the role of tension and harmonization of duality.
• Designing powerful rituals to amplify energy and participate actively in the creation process.
• Claiming our roles as Visionary Leaders of our lives and of the world.
• Working with powerful planetary correspondences and alchemical calculations in order to align more intentionally to our primary influences.

I hope that gives you some ideas! If you feel called to join us in working Eclipse Magic, please come meet us in the ethers.

Many blessings and happy Eclipse!

Personal Alchemy

My Morning Practice lately has been largely a movement fusion of my own invention: DanYoCoGong (dance, yoga, core and qi gong). Here's a bit of the dance part to let the creative expression flooooow...

I had a mini Soul Map reading the other day with a new friend. One of the things that resonated most deeply was the confirmation she offered about letting the silly, funny and creative part of me shine through my work.

As I've been playing with this process of Personal Alchemy over the last several months, I'm noticing my internal objections that naturally arise. Historically, I haven't shown that side as much when it comes to my professional face. I think a lot of that has come from wanting people to trust me, think I am capable and qualified, and not too young to be guiding them through major life stuff (I started my business when I was 21).

However...

There is room for Divine Play in the healing process. There is room for laughter in the darkness. There is room for dancing and being funny, even when it feels like everything around you is heavy. It doesn't mean we're taking the work less seriously. It just means that we remember that all things are birthed from the void and that creation springs up where death has passed moments before.

It means we remember that we can exist simultaneously in grief and humor, rage and creation, heaviness and grace.

Let the creative expression flow.

Let the Alchemy of personal transformation unfold.

~~~

It's so easy for us to get stuck.

• Have you ever taken a look at where you are in your life and had a sinking moment when you realized that you're in the same place you were a year ago? Two years ago?
• Have you ever felt like you always get to a certain spot in your job, your life, your relationships... and then everything falls apart and you have to start over?
• Have you told yourself over and over that you want to create a change in your life, but felt at a loss as to HOW that change was going to come about?

If you found yourself answering "yes!" to any of these questions, you might be stuck somewhere in one of the stages of the Alchemical process.

Alchemy is the process of change: even if we don't know it, we are moving through these stages in a continuous cycle throughout our entire lives. Most of us have no idea that we are living this cycle, and find ourselves washed around by the currents of change without any sense of direction or ability to consciously move through the process.

I have a gift for you.

I am offering eleven free one-hour sessions of Personal Alchemy! Here's the deal:

• This is first come, first served: once they're booked, they're booked. No reschedules, no wait list. Yes, this is my gift to you.
• We meet for one hour on my private conference line. I'll make a recording of your session, if you like!
• We'll explore where you are in your life right now and discover which of the Alchemical stages you're currently in.
• We'll look at the best way for you to get unstuck and continue to move through the cycle of Alchemy--get ready for personal practices and tools!
• If it feels like a good fit, we'll talk about ways we can continue to work together in your process of change (I AM Alchemy or one-on-one with me).

Book your Personal Alchemy session here!

Last time I put out an offer like this, it filled within a few days. If you're interested, please book your session ASAP.

Once you're registered, I'll contact you with further details for our Personal Alchemy session! I look forward to diving in with you.

New Moon in Capricorn: Sacred Structure

The New Moon in Capricorn next Tuesday brings us the powerful medicine of Sacred Structure.

Without our bones, it doesn't matter how much muscle or energy or force of will we have: we would not be able to move an inch.

The same is true of anything in our lives: without structure to support and hold a container, action becomes impossible. We spend so much time and energy focused on inspiration, movement, fire and momentum... but running around the world fueled by pure spirit is completely unsustainable. If we're hoping to build mountains, we need to root in the bedrock.

And I'm building mountains. Are you?

If so, we must focus on the foundations of our lives. What sacred structures can we build for ourselves to be able to grow? How can we strengthen the "bones" of our lives to give stability and sustainability to our actions? How can we make our work and our presence in the world more lasting, more meaningful and more powerful?

Let's build our bones together.

My Gift to You: Happy SOULstice!

This Winter SOULstice, I've been thinking about what I would like to give back to YOU, the amazing people in my life who inspire me to continue the work I do.

As work with Soul Contracts comes up big time during this darkest, most contract-ive time of the year, it feels more important now than ever before to clarify and clean up our Soul Agreements before heading into a new year.

So, I would like to invite you to receive a special gift. I am offering five FREE Soul Contract healing sessions to you during December 26-29!

Here are the details:
-These must take place in person at my healing studio in SW Portland. Address provided upon registration.
-Once you register, there are no reschedules.
-First come, first serve! Once these sessions are filled, they are filled.
-Register here to reserve your FREE Soul Contract healing session.

What you can expect from these sessions:
-We will journey into the nature of your Soul Contract to examine any clauses that are no longer serving you.
-If possible, we will erase and rewrite them with a healthy, new agreement.
-We will do energy healing work to help this contract alteration integrate gently into your lived experience.
-I will not be doing this work "for" you. I will be guiding you and holding space for you to claim your full power in stating the nature of your Soul Contract with Spirit.
-There will be an audio recording of this session for you to revisit at any time.

If you would like to claim your FREE Soul Contract Healing session now, register here!

The Medicine of Space

When we create spaciousness for ourselves, we can relax into BEing and presence. We can expand to fully embody all parts of ourselves. We can be as big as we actually are. We can welcome in new energies and remain balanced through dynamic shifts.

I’ve been keeping relatively quiet for the past couple of months as I sit with some very significant changes that are coming up in my life and my work. I won’t go into too much detail now as it is still crystalizing, but suffice it to say that everything (one-on-one work, teaching, programs, etc) is getting an overhaul. The way that I am moving through it with a greater degree of ease and grace than I could otherwise is... spaciousness.

Even so, the overhaul has brought on some anxiety. The inner voices share their doubts:

“Am I committing entrepreneurial suicide by switching up my offerings all the time?”
“What the heck do I think I’m doing?”
“Am I kidding myself?”
“What if this is way too far out for people? What if nobody is ready for this? What if nobody gets it?”
“How can I make all these massive changes without shooting myself in the foot?”

Those are some of the highlights, but you get the idea.

I just returned from a week-long trip to Sedona, AZ, where I experienced a great deal of new energy and catalysts, set some changes in motion and received some profound medicine. One of the highlights was a visit to the Grand Canyon.

I had never been to this particular sacred site before, and as I approached the canyon rim, I felt myself start to tear up. I could feel the energy swelling up out of the exposed layers—ancient and constant in its power. Moved beyond words, I wandered off by myself to stand on a cliff edge and feel the potent waves course through my body. The Grand Canyon is a giant portal, and the amount of raw power and potential held within each grain of sand is palpable.

“This is the kind of healer I want to be. I want to be this spacious, this ancient, this solid, yet mutable.”

As these realizations formed in my mind, I felt myself expand enough to accommodate the Grand Canyon within my energy field.

“I AM this spacious. I AM this ancient. I AM this solid, this mutable.”

No matter the direction my work takes from here, the kind of space I hold for myself and for others is that deep. The kind of container I set for transformation is that wide.

I sat down to write in my journal, tears continuing to blur my vision. I had no idea what I was writing, and only discovered after I read it later that night that I had written a declaration—a prayer to the Grand Canyon herself:

I AM big enough to hold you.

I AM strong enough to serve you.

I AM patient enough to learn from you—the lessons in each stone and grain of sand.

I AM ancient enough to remember you as flat, scorched Earth that gave off the sharp tang scent of new metal, fresh from the fire.

I AM small enough to curl myself into each pore in your cavernous walls… tiny wombs where crystals and magic are born.

I AM quiet enough to hear the stories that have been buried in your layers for aeons rise up as they are freed by matter dissolving into air.

I AM raw enough to feel the currents of wind stirred by Raven’s wing.

I AM humble enough to kneel here, to know that I have died here and to surrender my bones to you to compost into soil.

I AM embodied enough to feel that you are big enough to hold me.

I AM wild enough to want to scream and chant and howl and sing and fill your canyons with my prayers, but subtle enough to know that a whisper will suffice.

I know that there is space for you in my bones, in my cells. I feel my body drinking in your familiar magic. Make me ancient. Help me remember. Support me in crumbling away all the surface layers to reveal the parts of me that were present for the birth of this and other worlds. Instruct me in how I may better serve. Teach me the ways of timeless presence. I fill myself with you. I AM reverence. There is no room here for anything but the Truth. I see my blood on your walls. Let me lie here and dissolve.

This is the kind of spacious timelessness that constitutes the Void. In this reality, no healing work is needed because nothing needs to be “healed.” There is no need to fix, to change, to alter or adjust. There is only BEing and presence.

Within that spaciousness, all things are possible. When I hold the medicine of the Grand Canyon in my body, the doubting voices immediately become silent.

I invite you to examine where you can breathe more spaciousness into your life. In what ways can you allow more BEing and presence?

Many blessings!

New Moon in Leo: Self-Love, Sovereignty and Addiction

Self-Love, Sovereignty and Addiction.

...Wait, addiction?

Yes, you read that right.

The Leo archetype is well known for supporting the energies of self-love, worthiness, self-expression, sovereignty and shining our inner light into the world. But what does addiction have to do with that?

In short, everything.

In this case, I'm referring to addiction in many forms: not only substance abuse, but addictive patterns of behavior, addiction to beliefs and energy cycles, addiction to relationships... you get the idea.  Addictions help us cling to old ways of being where we get to stay small, disconnected from our truest selves and not claim our inner worth.

Let me give you an example. One of my own addictions that I learned of recently is addiction to suffering as part of the healing process. This came to light during a very intense ceremony where many people were struggling, and I was not. I felt very comfortable and grounded, but started to become anxious, wondering why I wasn't struggling with everyone else. I wondered if the healing I was receiving was as deep or profound as it could be. At this point, my guides tuned in and told me, "We're not going to make you suffer. You are addicted to suffering as part of the healing process, and it's time to release that for you, for everyone in this room and for all of humanity. You need to learn that healing that comes with ease and grace is actually more valid than healing that comes through suffering."

As soon as I heard that message, I released any remaining anxiety I had about my lack of suffering and was able to drop fully into the ceremony experience. Needless to say, it was powerful, profound and I DEFINITELY received deep healing.

Now that it's come to my attention, I can see that this particular pattern of addiction has been present with me for many years. Historically, I have liked to learn things the hard way. I have put myself in many situations where I experience deep suffering in the name of healing. I have used suffering to keep myself smaller than I am, because it's safer than living the fullest expression of my sovereignty.

Another addictive pattern that arose in my awareness recently was my addiction to self-judgement. During a ceremony, I received a gentle correction from a mentor of mine and immediately felt myself spiral into judgement. I made a tiny mistake, I did something wrong, now everyone things I'm horrible, blah blah blah.

I was fascinated to observe this very self-punishing thought pattern emerge from such a tiny thing. No harm had been caused, it was absolutely no big deal, and yet, I immediately plunged into criticism and judgement of myself so strongly that it took me aback. I observed these punishing thoughts like vines made of razors slicing over my my heart and mind, and I consciously released them.

I share these stories because addiction can be sneaky, and most of us don't easily recognize the addictive patterns that keep us small and disconnected from our self-love. In both of these cases where my addictive patterns came to light, I was able to discern them in part because of some powerful messages from my guides, but also because I have spent years cultivating a strong practice of self-love. This practice allowed me to see that these addictions made me feel unworthy, small and stupid. Because of my extensive personal practice of owning my sovereignty and my worth, I could distinguish the thought patterns that made me feel separate from my truest state of being.

I invite you to consider your own patterns of addiction. When you tune into your choices and behavior, what do you notice? What beliefs do you hold about your own worthiness and sovereignty? What patterns do you have that get in the way of living the fullest expression of your self-love? Now is the perfect time for these inquiries. Align your energies and intentions with this powerful New Moon container to release patterns of addiction. This is the first of TWO New Moons in Leo. Use this first one to remove any blockages and old patterns that no longer serve you, so next month you can plant the seeds of self-love and sovereignty under the container of the Eclipse.

(For more information on working with the Lunar Cycle, check out my LUNAR ALCHEMY course beginning September 12!)

In the name of loooooooooove!